Ten Reasons Why I Never Wash*

  1. I was forced to as a child.
  2. People who wash are hypocrites - they think they are cleaner than everybody else.
  3. There are so many different kinds of soap, I can't decide which one is best.
  4. I used to wash, but I got bored and stopped.
  5. I wash only on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.
  6. None of my friends wash.
  7. I'll start washing when I get older and dirtier.
  8. I can't spare the time.
  9. The bathroom is never warm enough in winter or cool enough in summer.
  10. People who make soap are only after your money.

*If you don't get it, try substituting another series of words for "wash." If you still don't get it, you probably won't think it is funny anyway.

http://godandscience.org/humor/neverwash.html

 

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