Inner Hate Towards The Trinity?

[Believer]

Okay, I am trying to be the best Christian I can be, I need God's help in my life, I want a better relationship with Him. However, my problem is that I am constantly thinking hatred thoughts against the Trinity, all 3. Like "God is fake, a liar, not real, f*** the trinity" and so on. These are internal thoughts I have. See, whenever I confront someone who doesn't beleive in God, I don't say anything, but I think in my thoughts, "this person is crazy to not beleive in God" and my thoughts start getting defensive towards them, but this is also when I am thinking hatred against the Trinity. So to break it down more easily, it goes like this:

a.) Thoughts Of Hatred Towards Trinity
b.) Defense Of The Trinity In My Thoughts When Nonbeleivers Speak

I don't know what is wrong with me. I get these thought spurts of hatred towards the Trinity and it really sucks because it feels like I already am predestined to go to hell. When I pray, I feel it goes nowhere. Why am I having these thoughts? I rebuke of Satan in Jesus' name, but nothing happens. That means it wouldn't be spiritual. I have asked God to take these thoughts away from me, and it hasn't happaned. I beleive in the Trinity, it's just that whenever I have an interest to listen to a Christian t.v. broadcast or audio program, I think "this is all bulls***!" What is wrong with me?????

[Prodigal Son]

you've talked about this several times. can you really not control these thoughts? if not, have you ever seen a professional on this? sounds like some type of obscessive/compulsive disorder...like having to check if the lights are off over and over...even when you just turned them off and can see they're off. sort of, i guess? what do you think?

[Kurieuo]

I'm inclined to agree with Prodigal Son a bit. Your issues seem to run deeper than simply this love-hate thing about the Trinity, and I think perhaps you should be seeking out professional counselling to sort out the source of your problem rather than worrying about the symptoms.

Kurieuo.

[Dan]

One might not be their own enemy, one might have an enemy within instead.

Seak out help because it's obvious there's a dichotomy in you that can't be explained with ease. A christian psychiatrist would be good (if those exist ).

[Believer]

Well, I do see a Christian counselor once every week. I keep getting feelings like I shouldn't go to my counselor because it isn't good for me, or that reading the Bible is evil, things like that. These thoughts I have I can't really control. It is blaspheming the Trinity, and that means the unpardonable sin, which then means I have lost my salvation. Also, I DO have OCD and ADD among other medical problems which I am seeking help for. I was telling my Christian counselor that I watched the final episode of Revelations on NBC last Wednesday and during the satanic sacrifice, out of nowhere I got a horrible bloody nose (no, I wasn't picking my nose ). Also when I went to church, as I drove there, my nose starting bleeding bad. Is this a sign of something from God or Satan? I always have the feeling that my prayers go unanswered and that I AM going to hell. I feel like God has abandoned me. Notice how all these things I mention are feelings, I don't think I am to rely on feelings, what are your thoughts? I pray to God to remove these blasphemous thoughts, I pray to have the demons leave me, I pray for a multitude of legetimate things God would honor, but nothing, and I do mean NOTHING happens .

[LittleShepherd]

Have you thought of demon possession? Or at least a strong demonic influence without actual possession? You're exhibiting some pretty clear symptoms. Reactions(the bad kind) to events that make no sense. Thoughts springing up out of nowhere, without reason -- they sound to me like they're not even your thoughts, but are things placed there to deceive. And if I read correctly, they get stronger and more persistent whenever you do manage to think or do something good concerning God. Like they're there doing battle.

Whatever the cause, you shouldn't keep this to yourself. An internet message board can only do so much good. Counseling's a bit better, but it can also only go so far(especially if the source of these thoughts isn't actually you) -- you need to enlist the help of real, live Christians to pray over you and stuff.

If you've been a Christian for a while, you should have a few really close friends you can turn to in times like this. If not...I dunno what to say. Relationships are a very important thing in the Christian life. We were never meant to go it alone, so you should start forming bonds ASAP. And in the meantime, you can still get your pastor and deacons to pray over you.

[kateliz]

I wasn't exactly sure how to respond to this, (as it's an on-going problem for you,) but as usual Little Shepherd wrote a response I can whole-heartedly agree with!

Demonic influence hits the nail on the head, (true Christians cannot be fully possessed because of the indwelling Holy Spirit.) Psychology isn't a secular thing that you need to go to the world for help with, (chemical imbalance kinds of things;) God's grace is sufficient for you. All you need is to learn how to apply it to your needs through faith.

And no, you're not to trust you feelings. Disregard those faulty, lying things and force yourself to stand on the facts as stated in the Bible. Having verses memorized that you can refer back to instantly would be a great aid with this.

[Anonymous]

I come from a long line of sincere penacostal christians and I think I can help you. I am aware of bad thoughts myself. I know what you are going through. I have heard Joyce meyers a Christian Leader say she was attacked by the enemy but in a different way. What to do to stop the thoughts....
1)In the morning get up and thank God for everything, next plead the Blood of Jesus on your mind, body, thoughts, and heart. Everything you can think of.
2) Keep christian music on like moody 90.1 fm. When saul was harassed by evil spirits David played the harp and it kept them away. Joyce says to
get a cd that has songs about the Blood of Jesus. Keep it on all day.
3) Pray, ask the Lord to help you
4) DO NOT TALK ABOUT THESE THOUGHTS. The enemy wants to know if his suggestions are working. Do NOT let him bounce ideas off of you. If the enemy knows exactly where your weakness are he will play on them if you let him.
5) See if the thoughts are coming from outside or inside, are you agreeing with them. Do not agree with them. If the devil says you are agreeing with him, in your mind keep saying no I am not and then pleading the Blood of Jesus on your mind.
6)Go to your local church and get prayed for by someone. Have your mom or dad someone who is developed in the Lord pray for you.
The bible says the devil is a liar so tell him what the bible says when he tries to say bad things to you. Read the Bible to the devil when he bothers you. Preach at him.
7) The bible says to resist the devil and he will flee and that is true but there is some opening in your life where you are not listening to God and the devil is not afraid of you but he will run if you read the Bible to him and when you play songs about the Blood of Jesus.
7) Preach a sermon to the devil when he lies to you. Tell him exactly what God thinks of him, Tell the devil he is the father of lies , that he has not hope but you do. He is going to burn forever and you will not. This really helps a lot.

8)As long as you do not want to have these hateful thoughts then you are resisting them in your own way.
9) When I was having bad thoughts the scripture I was given was in Acts
I dont know where you can find it online I guess.

"Seeing these things cannot be spoken against, Ye ought to be quiet and do nothing rashly" You are saying things rashly, I do not believe you mean them.
The point is to be quiet, but the more I got quiet the worse it was for me. Just obey that verse and things will quiet down.

You are not going to hell because the devil puts lies in you mind and that is all he is doing. If he can put doubt in your heart like he did in adam and eve then he is accomplishing what his intention is.
Realize that the only defense the devil has is your mind, if he cannot get that he loses.
Jesus will help you but keep saying I hate bad thoughts, read the Bible to the devil, plead the Blood of Jesus, and get a cd somewhere, and clean up any areas in your life that do not agree with God's Way of living.

Watch you language, thoughts, whats on TV, the way you treat people ect...and you will see victory in your life.