50 Shades Of Gray

[Murray]

E-mail from my pastor sent aout about a week ago. Apparently it's showing up all over the country and he's getting angry e-mails left and right about it. What do you think?

One of the phrases used to describe the fallen and sinful people of Israel just prior to the collapse of their nation is found in Jeremiah 8:12: “These people have no shame. They have forgotten how to blush.” In other words, these people not only engage in immoral and indecent behaviors, they are no longer even embarrassed or ashamed of these behaviors.

I thought about these words from Jeremiah when I read an article on the popularity of a new book entitled “Fifty Shades of Grey” which is described as an “Erotic Novel” by E.L. James. This book is actually the first in a trilogy of books, focusing on the sexual affair of a wealthy businessman named Christian Grey and an innocent young college student named Anastasia Steele. What makes this particular book series so raunchy and inappropriate is the detailed sexual descriptions (which I admittedly have not read, but these have been frequently mentioned as part of the book’s appeal). Plus, the type of sexual relationship that develops between Christian and Anastasia is one of “BDSM” (Bondage, Discipline, Sadism and Masochism).

This book has taken American pop-culture by storm. Sometimes referred to as “mommy porn,” because it is primarily being purchased and read by women in their late 20’s through their 40’s, this trilogy of books has sold more than 20 million copies, selling faster than the Harry Potter books ever did. This book is especially popular in E-book form, where people can download and read the smutty details at coffee shops and on subways without others knowing what they are reading. But it’s not just reading that is going on. Hardware stores are reporting a shortage of cotton rope (the type of rope used by Christian to tie up Anastasia as part of their sexual relationship). Hotels are offering “Fifty Shades of Grey” specials, where couples can check into a hotel room and live out their BDSM fantasies. There are strong sales of “50 Shades of Grey” tee shirts, featuring a large image of handcuffs on the front. Now Hollywood is excited about plans for a movie adaptation, and there is wild speculation about which Hollywood “hunk” and “hottie” should play the lead characters in the movie.

I am not a prude, I have no major hang-ups about human sexuality, and I am not the morality police. But I feel compelled to say this: Those of us who claim to be Christians should be thoroughly disgusted with all of this, and we should not be reading the books, buying related merchandise, or making plans to go and see the movie when it comes out. There comes a time when the products of an entertainment-driven culture become so vile and base that there is just no room for compromise. This is that time, and “50 Shades of Grey “ is the straw that has broken the camel’s back. Have we forgotten how to blush? Is there now nothing that is deemed just plain inappropriate?

My young adult daughter recently mentioned to me that she was thinking about reading the books. She is in a young woman’s book club and she was curious about why this book was so popular. I had a serious talk with her about it, and encouraged her not to read it. But she raised a couple of issues I want to address in this enote.

First, she said, “Dad, how can you condemn a book you have not read yourself?” This is the old argument of “don’t knock it until you’ve tried it,” which may be true about pizza with pineapple on it, but isn’t true about stuff that is obviously sinful and harmful. I do not need to try snorting cocaine in order to know it is unhealthy and addictive. I do not need to get drunk and drive in order to know it is dangerous and deadly. And I do not need to read “mommy porn” to know it promotes thoughts, images, and behaviors that demean women and create an unhealthy and unholy view of human sexuality.

Secondly, my daughter argued, “Dad, even though there are some parts of the books that may be inappropriate, I’ve heard that by the end of the three books, the main characters have learned a lot and grown to be better people. The books contain a good message.” This is the old, “the good message justifies the explicit sex” argument that has been used to justify all kinds of books, music, movies, and television shows over the past several years. It seems as though we can’t have a book or movie with a good message these days unless we wade through lots of sexual scenes and foul language in order to get there. What I told my daughter was this: “If you want a book with a good message, find one that doesn’t use a bunch of porn to get the message out.” There are plenty of good books for a book club. My wife is in a book club, and they just finished “To Kill a Mockingbird,” a classic. I recently finished reading “Fearless” by Eric Blehm, which tells the true story of Navy Seal Adam Brown. A fantastic read. With plenty of good books out there, why not focus on those that are worth our time and money. I mean, occasionally you may be able to find a good biscuit in a garbage can, but that is not the place to go looking. And “50 Shades of Grey” is not just a garbage can, it is a garbage dump.

I can understand why non-Christians will be attracted to this book. I can understand the so-called “enlightened” pop-culture psychologists who are tripping all over themselves to get on television talk shows and declare that the books help re-invigorate the boring sex lives of middle aged American women. These folks have allowed the foolishness of this world to blind them to basic truth and basic decency. They have forgotten how to blush. But I certainly hope that Christians will be wiser and better than that. If you are reading this book, please stop. If you are not reading this book, please don’t start. And if you’re tempted to explore this book, please pray to God and ask Him if this would honor Him in any way. Open up your Bible and read Philippians 4:8. Use this verse as the criteria for what you will read, watch, and think about.

To her credit, my daughter decided not to read any of the “50 Shades of Grey” books. If I can convince anybody else to reach the same conclusion, I will consider it a job well done.

--Pastor Mark

His e-mail is <mark.miller@ebenezerumc.org> if your interested to give him feedback

[Ivellious]

I have to admit I had only heard about this book and had no idea what it was about. It's really not "up my alley" in terms of what I like to read, but a quick internet search gave me several summaries of the book and people's opinions on the matter. Oddly, I didn't find many groups or people who objected to the adultery or the explicit nature of it, but many people criticized how the characters didn't seem realistic and the interactions between characters seemed forced into the direction of BDSM, not developed in a normal-sounding way.

It's interesting that you post this when someone recently made a post about anti-Christian literature. While this book doesn't really fall into "anti-Christian" literature, your pastor seems to feel that it glorifies sexual sin. I won't necessarily argue that (since I have not read it). That said, I have to point out that there are an enormous collection of books that involve adultery as the main theme (glance through the descriptions of the romance section sometime), and most of those don't get condemned for anything. BDSM is a less-covered topic in literature, but again, it's not unheard of either.

Not that I don't respect his opinion, but I think your pastor misses the point of literature when he says that sex and foul language override any kind of good themes in books. Lots of "classics" deal with these themes and other sinful lifestyles in detail. Honestly, if books were expected to never deal with tough subjects, literature would by and large be a rather dull art form. In the case of sexually explicit romance novels, I would classify that under the "if you don't like it, don't read it" category. If it offends you, don't pick it up.

I'm not a fan of censorship in books at all, even if I find it distasteful or unappealing. Literature is one of very few art forms that has been able to express all types of ideas over the centuries, and I'm not a fan of telling anyone that they can't write something with literary value. Again, if you don't like it, don't read it, but don't expect everyone else to boycott it as well. Honestly, this book is probably just a fad anyway, and will die out as soon as the next big best-selling novel is released. Your pastor says he isn't the morality police, but then proceeds to say that this book is too shameful to be allowed to be read by Christians.

Well, that's my take on it anyway.

[Icthus]

[quote="Ivellious"Not that I don't respect his opinion, but I think your pastor misses the point of literature when he says that sex and foul language override any kind of good themes in books. Lots of "classics" deal with these themes and other sinful lifestyles in detail. Honestly, if books were expected to never deal with tough subjects, literature would by and large be a rather dull art form. In the case of sexually explicit romance novels, I would classify that under the "if you don't like it, don't read it" category. If it offends you, don't pick it up.[/quote]

I think what he meant was that often times people use the supposedly moral outcome of a story as a weak justification of whatever immoral content (usually thrown in to pander to the audience) went into it. A good example would be the infamously bad movie The Sinister Urge. The film sets itself up as a cautionary tale about the negative effects of the porn industry (lol at people turning into mindless murderers when they look at 'smut pictures'), but it mostly uses this as an excuse to parade scantily clad women across the screen. The official message is that the industry is bad for women, communities, and madmen (apparently), but the film reeks of "Hey look at the women! If you want to see more, then go buy porn!" The same could be said of innumerable low-grade films of the time (Who remembers Reefer Madness?). That was sort of a tangent, but the point isn't that you can't have tough subjects and a good moral lesson, just that tagging a lesson on the end doesn't justify the tough subjects when they aren't taken seriously and are just used for entertainment. Honestly, I've never read the books and don't intend to, but I know the kind of stuff that publishers like to push on an all-to-willing constituency of customers, and there isn't a speck of intelligence in the way any controversial or tough issues are dealt with. It's all about thrills (of various sorts), and sticking an 'everything turns out fine' ending doesn't do anything to change that.

That said, I agree that censorship is a bad thing, though, of course, refusing to buy something and telling other people not to do so either isn't censorship. Actually, if there is one thing about such books that I hate, it's the bad writing. We used to have a running joke at my university in which we'd refer to particularly poorly-written student work as "publishable" just as a riff on the state of "literature" these days. It's like Proletkult gone mad. It's a quagmire of terrible writing and inane characterization. Not that we in academia are exactly outdoing ourselves as far as quality goes.

End elitist rant.

[1over137]

Just curious: What he thinks about kamasutra?

[Murray]

Ummm. i'm not sure, you can go ahead and ask, i'm not going to

[1over137]

That would be strange if I asked. I thought you were friends.

[PaulSacramento]

So that is what passes as good literature nowadays eh?
Ah well, the generation that gave us reality TV shows and Jersey shore...what were you expecting? Shakespeare ??

[Rob]

I find it hilarious (and telling) that this book started out as a twilight fan fiction.

You know what to expect when someone holds it up excitedly and says "This book is so great! And I don't even like reading!"

Ugh.

[Beanybag]

"This book is so great BECAUSE I don't even like reading!".

Fixed.

[Philip]

So, what is the allure of "50 Shades of Grey for MARRIED individuals?" I can tell you it's because they want to find some sexual vehicle to fire up their sexual imaginations, to re-ignite passion and desire within their relationships, yet without buying "actual" porn, and by buying a book that now seems mainstream and socially acceptable, yet that also delves into areas that are taboo for most of "polite" society.

As for married Christians, God wants us to be happy, content and excited within our sexuality and expressions of it. I'm convinced God truly wants us to enjoy exciting, rocking sex lives with our spouses, of which the pale imitations that the world presents as alternatives are exceptionally inferior and sinful. Porn, which includes the above mentioned book, is a dysfunctional, damaging and ultimately, unsuccessful route (and attempted shortcut) to truly loving, spiritual, physical and emotional intimacy.

I can't recommend enough the explorations, discussions, resources and advice on married CHRISTIAN sexuality found here: http://site.themarriagebed.com/front-page. The forum alone is outstanding. There truly is no aspect of sexuality's triumphs, struggles, ideas, spiritual implications, quest for mental and physical excitement, that is not explored in depth on this great site. Cool thing is that it also navigates and technically operates much like G&S does.