Recipes For Christians Only

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

I have developed a series of Christian recipes which I'd like to share with the members of G&S. For this first recipe, I've chosen Rum & Raisin Ice Cream. I use an electric ice cream maker, a Cuisinart ICE-30BC. (This model was purchased in the Ewe Knighted States and is also available in Europe.) All quantities are in US/UK measures.

Rum & Raisin Ice Cream

-1 half-quart medium cream (around 15% milk fat) (about 475ml)
-one quarter cup raisins (about 60ml)
-rum
-one half cup brown sugar (about 120ml)

-3 days before making the ice cream, put the ice cream maker's bucket in the freezer. Also, take a small container (an espresso cup works well) and fill it with the raisins. Add enough rum to cover the raisins, cover. Store at room temperature.
-One the day you make the ice cream, put the cream into a bowl and dissolve the brown sugar into it. It doesn't have to dissolve perfectly. Put the cream & sugar mixture in the freezer for about 45 minutes to cool it.

Making the ice cream:

-Put the frozen bucket into the ice cream maker. Turn ON. Pour in the cream & sugar mixture. Allow to churn for 10 minutes or so. When there is no more visible liquid, spoon in the raisins and about 2 tablespoons (30ml) of rum.
-continue churning for another 10 minutes or so, until the mixture takes on the consistency of soft ice cream.

It may be eaten right away or stored in the freezer for up to a week. It is best the day after making.

Enjoy!

FL


HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY. CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS ANGUISH, GNASHING OF THE TEETH, AND SPONTANEOUS HUMAN COMBUSTION.

[RickD]

Here FL. I fixed your health alert.

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY.(except southern baptists, because they will go to hell for even touching rum, or any of the Devil's liquor) CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS ANGUISH, GNASHING OF THE TEETH, AND SPONTANEOUS HUMAN COMBUSTION.

[1over137]

Not for me. I do not like the taste of the alcohol, nor the whole alcohol.

[Storyteller]

I haven't got an ice cream maker

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

Here FL. I fixed your health alert.

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY.(except southern baptists, because they will go to hell for even touching rum, or any of the Devil's liquor) CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS ANGUISH, GNASHING OF THE TEETH, AND SPONTANEOUS HUMAN COMBUSTION.

Not for me. I do not like the taste of the alcohol, nor the whole alcohol.

Oh...OK. The rum is there mostly to prevent ice crystals from forming in the cream as it freezes. (Rum also provides a flavor.) Most "natural" ice creams use vanilla extract which also contains alcohol. A neutral spirit, such as vodka, may be used as well. This ice cream recipe also works with cranberry vodka and dried cranberries; you must substitute white sugar for brown sugar if you make the cranberry version. For those who can't use alcohol for legalistic reasons, you may use sodium hexametaphosphate or simethicone (yummy!) to prevent ice crystals or just serve the ice cream right after churning.

I haven't got an ice cream maker

Don't worry, Cyclops, I have other Christian recipes. My next delicious post will feature Purgatory Poppers, an entrée which is sure to please all the men in your life. Women love them too!

FL

[Storyteller]

But I want ice cream!

You're just being a tease.

These putgatory poppers better be good!

[Jac3510]

That sounds delicious, FL. I think, because I'm not patient enough to wait three days for a first serving, I will start by just making it sans the cream. And sugar. And raisins. Maybe an extra helping of rum and a splash of coke as the sugar substitute.

actually I really would like to try this, but as I prefer cranberries to raisins, the alternate is probably what I'll do

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

This next Christian recipe, Purgatory Poppers are a great finger food. The flavor of the spicy jalapeno shell is wonderfully contrasted by the meat & cheese stuffing.
Cooked on the BBQ, this is mostly a treat for men...but intelligent women will enjoy them as well.

Purgatory Poppers

-one pack (4 to 6) fresh sausages from the market
-a dozen or so jalapeno peppers
-a pack of bacon
-about 4oz (120g) flavorful hard cheese (Parmigian, old cheddar or Emmenthal work best)
-garlic cloves to taste
-salt & pepper to taste
-hot sauce, such as Tabasco
-toothpicks

Slice open sausages and empty the meat into a mixing bowl. Discard sausage skins. Grate cheese and add to mixing bowl. ^Chop garlic finely and add to mixing bowl. Add salt & pepper and hot sauce to taste. Blend all ingredients together and set aside. (If desired, you may add a steak sauce to this mixture.)

Slice jalapenos lengthwise in halves and remove seeds and white parts (CAUTION: wear latex or nitrile gloves for this operation!) Once the jalapenos are all cut, fill each half with the sausage mixture (keep your gloves on!) Roll a strip of bacon around each filled half-jalapeno and fix it with a toothpick. Your Purgatory Poppers are ready!

Cook the Purgatory Poppers on the BBQ about 10 minutes on the top rack, or use low heat. Turn now & then.

These poppers are great with Ranch or a tomato-based sauce: dip the Purgatory Popper in the sauce and enjoy!

FL

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY. CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS WHEEZING, CHOKING AND SUDDEN DEATH.

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

Here is another quick & easy Christian recipe. I made it this evening and really enjoyed it. So did my dog.

Seafood Pizza

-Store bought pizza dough, or have your wife make it for you.
-three-quarter cup (about 175ml) cooked shrimp
-three-quarter cup cooked scallops
-three-quarter cup (or one small tin) of crabmeat
-about one cup (250ml or so) sliced mushrooms
-2 cups grated mozzarella

You'll need a sauce, one-and-a-half cups of sauce. I use a béchamel (white sauce) but tonight I made it with a marinara sauce. Both are delicious!

Preheat oven to 450F (about 225C). Form pizza dough into a round pan. In a bowl, mix sauce and seafood and spread this mixture on the pizza dough. cover with the sliced mushrooms, then top with the grated mozzarella.

Cook for about 10 minutes. Enjoy with a glass of white wine!

FL

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY. CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS HYPERVENTILATION, FEVER AND BRAIN DEATH.

[RickD]

Here is another quick & easy Christian recipe. I made it this evening and really enjoyed it. So did my dog.

That's not saying much. I know a few French Canadians dogs that also enjoy eating cat poop and used feminine products.

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

Canberra Hilton told me that she enjoys vodka & lime juice. This inspired me to create a lime-flavored ice cream. I went to my local liquor store and bought a half bottle of lime-flavored vodka. I'm quite sure you could make this ice cream with regular vodka as well. I call my lime ice cream Key Lime but you can make it with regular (Persian) limes. Key Limes are only available in Florida, are smaller and rounder & sweeter than regular limes. Thankfully, RickD sent me a case of Key Limes so I can really call my ice cream,

Key Lime Ice Cream

-one half quart medium cream (around 15% milk fat) (about 475ml)
-two limes
-vodka or lime vodka
-one half cup white sugar
-one drop green food coloring (optional)

-3 days before making the ice cream, put the ice cream maker's bucket in the freezer. Also, grate the peel of the two limes and put the grated peel into a small container. Add enough vodka to cover the grated lime peel. Cover & store at room temperature.
-On the day you make the ice cream, put the cream into a bowl and dissolve the white sugar into it. Dissolve well. Put the cream & sugar mixture into the freezer to cool for about 45 minutes.

making the ice cream:

-Put the frozen bucket into the ice cream maker. Turn ON. Pour in the cream and sugar mixture, add a drop of green food coloring if desired. Allow to churn for 10 minutes or so. When there is no more visible liquid, fork in the grated peel from the vodka bath. Add about 2 tablespoons of the vodka bath to the ice cream and allow to churn for 10 more minutes, until the mixture takes on the consistency of soft ice cream.

It may be eaten right away or stored in the freezer for up to a week. it is best the day after making.

A delightfully tart & unusual ice cream!

FL

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY. CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHEISTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS PSYCHOSIS, RENAL FAILURE AND APOPLECTIC SEIZURES.

[melanie]

Ohh la la
I'm making this FL!
But did it freeze Using alcohol in icecream makes it difficult to freeze.
What's your secret?

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

Ohh la la
I'm making this FL!
But did it freeze Using alcohol in icecream makes it difficult to freeze.
What's your secret?

The alcohol is there to prevent ice crystals from forming after the finished product is stored in the freezer. The alcohol works as a stabilizer; commercial ice creams use other stabilizers. Gelato uses egg yolks as a stabilizer...I'm not a fan of raw eggs in ice cream...

The ice cream will freeze with 2 tbsp of vodka, no problem. If you plan to store it longer than one week, you can add more vodka. I made my Key lime Ice Cream last Saturday AM and it is frozen solid in my freezer at -17c. No ice crystals so far but I will put in more lime vodka next time...3 tbsp instead of 2.

FL

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

Another unusual taste sensation for those of you who want to try something really different.

Cigar Bourbon

1 bottle of bourbon
1 cigar

Pour the bourbon into a glass jar with a closeable top. Take a good cigar and submerge it in the bourbon. Cover, leave to marinate two weeks. When ready, filter the bourbon back into its original bottle using a coffee filter and a funnel.

This recipe works with bourbon and brandy. The resulting liquid may be used to marinate steaks, create sauces or used to make cocktails.

FL

HEALTH ALERT THIS RECIPE IS FOR BORN AGAIN CHRISTIANS ONLY. CONSUMPTION BY PAGANS, HEATHEN AND ATHIESTS MAY CAUSE UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS DANDRUFF, MACTROCYCTIC ANEMIA AND VASCULAR DEMENTIA.

[RickD]

Just thinking about that makes me want to