I've been gone from here for probably a month or so. Well, my last month has been terrible. On March 8th I got married (re-married actually to the same woman). Two weeks later she revealed to me that she had feelings for a guy at work. Now she's gone. We'd been together but not remarried since 2011, then we married and she dropped the bomb on me that she'd been seeing this guy for a while.
I thought I was doing what God wanted by making my family whole again. I can't believe she could stand up there, look me in the eyes, say the things she said and then just poof- all gone. And for some guy that she has nothing in common with but race. That's another thing I don't understand. The guy is smaller than her (she's tiny), also Asian, but acts like a gangsta and sounds like Chris Rock.
I've met him a few times. He even shook my hand once when I was picking her up from hanging out with her "friends" (read: him).
She's moved out of the house now. She broke the news to my poor daughter that she was leaving a few weeks ago. It was a terrible, terrible thing to behold. She's broken. I'm broken. I don't even know what to feel anymore. There are no tears left in my body.
For the first time ever I feel like I hate her and that scares me. I'm supposed to forgive her, but I can't. Not now anyway. Not after the dog and pony show she put me through in front of our church and families. My daughter and I bonded a lot nearing Easter over our common love for Christ. I watched some Jesus movies with her and answered all her questions. She told me she wanted to become a disciple of Him and would like to be baptized. That Easter Sunday at church we had baptisms and I wrote something special for her. Both her mother and I stood up there with her and it was that evening that her mother revealed to me that she was actually leaving for sure. (She'd been telling me about her feelings for this guy a couple weeks before).
So now it's just her and I in our house together. She's been staying over at this douche bag's apartment. (He's 35- 10 years older than her- and still has a room mate in a college area of town. Real winner.)
I haven't talked to her much, but she has now revealed to me that this entire thing was God's will for her life. She actually believes that God got her her job in order to meet this guy, cheat on me, marry me, then divorce me to be with this guy. How messed up is that?
I told her that her God is herself and she's as bad as Mohammed. Funny how God's will lines up with exactly what she wants to do.
![Rolling Eyes :roll:](./images/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif)
I don't know guys. The nights have been terrible. When you're used to being with someone it gets really lonely.
She's tried to come back to me like 6 times now. A requirement from me for her to come back was to cut things off with this guy, which seems to me like a very reasonable request. Apparently it's not because she's not willing to do it.