Would you accept an LGBT relative if they threatened you with an ultimatum?

[Blessed]

If you had a brother sister son or daughter that you loved very much and they announced they were LGBT and that if you did not "accept" their gay lifestyle choice - attending their LGBT events, the gay wedding, participating family events like normal - they would cut you out of their lives (i.e. "accept my choice or else") what would you do?



1) Put up a fake act and accept their choices because you love them and you're too afraid to lose them. Then let them proclaim how happy they are you've "accepted" their sin.

2) Tell them you love them but will not accept their ultimatums. Refuse to participate with them in Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, Good Friday, family gatherings etc - if you can help it.

[Philip]

Emphasize loving them - even socializing. But also making them understand you don't agree with their views on the morality of it, nor will you be emotionally blackmailed into endorsing their unscriptural beliefs. If they were to wed, I would not attend.

[DBowling]

I pretty much agree with what Phillip said.

Most importantly we need to show everyone the love of Jesus.
We should continue to spend time with and be there for family even if (especially if) they are trapped in immorality and sin.

However, I also agree with Phillip that we as Christians should not be coerced into actively taking part in or enabling behavior that is contrary to the Word of God.
If another person wants to break off a relationship with us because we refuse to actively participate in immoral behavior, then that is their choice.

But our choice should be love.

[PaulSacramento]

Love first, always.
God is love.

We must distinguish between the WHO and WHAT a person IS to WHO and WHAT they DO.

[Kurieuo]

Hey, if I attend their LGBT events, will they in return attend Christian events I'd line up? Maybe we can exchange.

[B. W.]

Tell them with blunt truth:

How do you like coercion?

Leave it at that. Don't attend.
-
-
-

[melanie]

Just recently in Australia we had a marriage equality vote.
It caused division and a rift between two different camps of thought. (No pun intended lol).
Felt quite personally in my own family.
My cousin is gay and when her Dad my Uncle was posting on Facebook in disagreement to marriage equality things got a little heated.
Her older brother sprung to her defence. He had some pretty scathing words to say against his Dad. It was sad and awkward to witness over such a public forum.
My cuz reprimanded her brother in a kind and loving way and defended her Dad. She supported his right to have his opinion. She disagreed obviously with his stance but her main focus was to mend bridges between her brother and father.
As a gay woman, in the midst of such a controversial time she took offence to her brother’s ultimatum to their Dad which was you either support your daughter or we’re done.
Her first and foremost concern and thought was her family. No agenda.
Just a girl who didn’t want a wedge driven between her family.
She is a kind, loving and beautiful girl. Who when faced with her straight brothers ultimatum to their Dad.....you either support her or else she responded with love and a spirit of reconciliation.
So to answer your question B.W and by her example in regards to family and ultimatums if that is met with kindness and love then any divide can be mended with bridges.
If and when she gets married her Dad probably may not attend but she is choosing to love him and forgive him anyway.
I would like to think that everyone would regardless of any dividing topic take a similar stance.

[RickD]

Melanie wrote:
If and when she gets married her Dad probably may not attend but she is choosing to love him and forgive him anyway.

Since you didn't go into detail about what your cousin's dad actually said or did, what exactly is she forgiving him for?

[Philip]

Sounds like the girl doesn't think her dad needs to apologize for having his own beliefs? If so, great!

[RickD]

Blessed wrote:
If you had a brother sister son or daughter that you loved very much and they announced they were LGBT and that if you did not "accept" their gay lifestyle choice - attending their LGBT events, the gay wedding, participating family events like normal - they would cut you out of their lives (i.e. "accept my choice or else") what would you do?

I like to think WWJD in these situations. So, I'd probably crash their wedding, and overturn some tables.

If you do go that route, please be sure to take a video of it so we all can be amused.

[melanie]

Melanie wrote:
If and when she gets married her Dad probably may not attend but she is choosing to love him and forgive him anyway.

Since you didn't go into detail about what your cousin's dad actually said or did, what exactly is she forgiving him for?

Forgiveness is a really interesting concept and discussion and vitaly important to the Christian way.
We often think that someone has to be justifiably wrong before forgiveness becomes necessary.
I thought this way for a very long time.
If I’ve done wrong, I’ll apologise.
Somewhere amoung the intricacies of life I realised how flawed that concept was. I was basing all my reasoning on my perception.
If I believed I’d done wrong, which for a stubborn, feisty girl was a really selfless step to being forgiving.
You’re wrong and I forgive you.
I could do that.
But that left so much unforgiveness. If I was basing it off what I thought I had to be sorry for then my personal perception was leaving the most difficult and hurtful situations raw and unresolved.
Should I forgive someone that maybe didn’t deserve it or when I cross examined the situation it shouldn’t even be a question?
For a long time I thought no.
Why should I say sorry for something or seek to forgive another for something that I didn’t perceive as wrong.
That concept flows both ways. If we are hurt by another and they believe their actions aren’t meant to be hurtful then should we forgive them?

The most active expression of love is forgiveness.
It’s a personal relevation and flows more so from the forgiver. It takes courage and compassion. It’s not easy.
I think regardless of when we strip apart the situation and access who is in the position of blame or whether it’s personally justifiable for someone to feel hurt by another if that person is willing to put forward forgiveness then it’s mending and even if it’s mending our own perception of the situation it’s to be celebrated.
We are forgiven by Jesus, although we don’t deserve it.
I find it not in tune to His teachings when we forgive only when we think we should because the premise of Christianity is to being forgiving even when we’re not worthy.

[RickD]

Melanie wrote:
If and when she gets married her Dad probably may not attend but she is choosing to love him and forgive him anyway.

Since you didn't go into detail about what your cousin's dad actually said or did, what exactly is she forgiving him for?

Forgiveness is a really interesting concept and discussion and vitaly important to the Christian way.
We often think that someone has to be justifiably wrong before forgiveness becomes necessary.
I thought this way for a very long time.
If I’ve done wrong, I’ll apologise.
Somewhere amoung the intricacies of life I realised how flawed that concept was. I was basing all my reasoning on my perception.
If I believed I’d done wrong, which for a stubborn, feisty girl was a really selfless step to being forgiving.
You’re wrong and I forgive you.
I could do that.
But that left so much unforgiveness. If I was basing it off what I thought I had to be sorry for then my personal perception was leaving the most difficult and hurtful situations raw and unresolved.
Should I forgive someone that maybe didn’t deserve it or when I cross examined the situation it shouldn’t even be a question?
For a long time I thought no.
Why should I say sorry for something or seek to forgive another for something that I didn’t perceive as wrong.
That concept flows both ways. If we are hurt by another and they believe their actions aren’t meant to be hurtful then should we forgive them?

The most active expression of love is forgiveness.
It’s a personal relevation and flows more so from the forgiver. It takes courage and compassion. It’s not easy.
I think regardless of when we strip apart the situation and access who is in the position of blame or whether it’s personally justifiable for someone to feel hurt by another if that person is willing to put forward forgiveness then it’s mending and even if it’s mending our own perception of the situation it’s to be celebrated.
We are forgiven by Jesus, although we don’t deserve it.
I find it not in tune to His teachings when we forgive only when we think we should because the premise of Christianity is to being forgiving even when we’re not worthy.

I'm sorry. I meant, what did she feel that he did wrong, that she feels anger or resentment about, that she feels she needs to forgive him?

[B. W.]

You know Mel, when people are determine to live hell bound and justify using the bible concept of God's love to justify the direction they are heading with such things like gay marriage too those who are in fact bound for hell by their own will and choice will have to answer God at a future time on this matter. That matter is for theirs alone to make.

Do you not know God's wrath has three stages?

God's three stages of wrath:

1st stage consist of this principle:

Psalms 81:11,12 "But My people would not heed My voice, And Israel would have none of Me.12 So I gave them over to their own stubborn heart, To walk in their own counsels." NKJV

Found also in Genesis to Jude. Summed up in Romans 1:24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32 note verses 24 and 32

God turns people to their own devices so that they sicken of the effect of sin and death in life and repent and return to Him.

In fact Psalms 107:1-43 explains that this is part of God's loving kindness used to turn a soul from darkness to light. If they do not, the second stage of wrath begins with the same goal - repent - turn away from drakness

2nd stage of God's wrath is seen all through the bible and in God's dealing with ancient Israel. If they rejected to return to him, all sorts of natural calamities or invasions befell the people to wake them up to return to Him. If they did, all was well again - if not - not so good.

God's third stage of wrath

Rev 3:19 revels the nature of God's third stage of wrath is and looks like. The 3rd stage of God's wrath consist of the full and final fury of a rejected despised abused love in total action - there is no repentance because people reject all notion of turning back to God.

This stage is mentioned in these verses: Rev 9:20 - Rev 9:21 - Rev 16:9 - Rev 16:11

This stage only happens only when these verses are fulfilled so until then we live with the 1st two stages of God's wrath.

I suggest, mel, that you look at why God does not support gay marriage and life style and not your own or the cultural justification for it.

It is not about marriage - it is about control and domination of will over others. The people of Sodom wanted to have sex with Gods messengers - to dominate them, push their will upon all others resulting in the most vile and unclean lifestyle that demand God prove he is so loving by accepting them or else he can't be God. That is called pride and June is what month according to cultural - Gay Pride month...

Now they are pushing this lifestyle upon little kids in schools. In my career in criminal justice working with sex offenders, we call this grooming for victims but in culture this is called helping toddlers become more expressive and accepting of same and all sexual encounters.

Do you support that grooming?

Inside all human beings, gay and straight, are seven things God considers to be an abomination: see below verses with expand word meanings and expression added in)

Pro 6:16 These six things the LORD hates, Yes, seven are an abomination to Him:
Pro 6:17 A proud (I am Justified) look, A lying (slanderous character assassinating) tongue, Hands that shed innocent blood,
Pro 6:18 A heart that devises wicked plans (which groom and seeks control), Feet that are swift in running to evil (justify evil as the greatest good by pitting God's character traits against each to justify such running as okay and approved to do),
Pro 6:19 A false witness who speaks lies, And one who sows discord among brethren.

In even the noblest of Gay people is that 'justified look' and all the rest too. God's Grace came to change us out of this and away form this sort of darkness. This is brought out in John 3:16,17,18,19,20 ... God's grace and love changes as well as condemns - how...

John 3:19-20, "And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed." NKJV

The reason people don't want to change is that they love what God hates and calls an abomination above all else. But for those that see that their own devises and ways 'are not working' - God's grace changes...

John 3:21 "But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God." NKJV

We are entering near the beginning of the last days period so it is no surprise to see as it was in the days of Noah and Lot is upon us now.

Psalms 97:10, "You who love the LORD, hate evil! He preserves the souls of His saints; He delivers them out of the hand of the wicked." NKJV

Please note that the word meaning of both the Greek and Hebrew words translated evil/wickedness contain the idea of warping and twisting morality to justify one self to do what God does not like while demanding that God is unjust for not accepting their ways - please note 1 Co 6:9,10,11
-
-
-

[Philip]

One of the biggest lies many Christians buy into is: "God gave gay people their sexual orientation and same-sex attraction." As for how they disavow the serious warnings about how God shows his hatred for the practice is rather strange, as it is demonstrated across the Old and New Testaments, by Jesus, His hand-picked prophets and apostles - I can't see how anyone that believes Scripture is God's word can deny it (if they deny it's God's word, that tells me a lot about how they view God). No, it is not OUR job to judge these peoples' fate - but it IS the job of Christians to uphold what Scripture says about it. To remain silent or go along with it is about the most UNLOVING thing a Christian could ever do to them. Now, that's not to say a person's sexual issues are what we should first focus on. Our first focus should be to show them love and kindness - and eventually, that would include standing up for God's view of this issue once the subject comes up (and believe me, it WILL come up!). But I've never met a practicing, self-identifying gay person who I've had a sense that they were saved and loved the Lord. Now, I'm sure that such people DO exist and that they are struggling against this sin just as heterosexual adulterers might, or those struggling with whatever other sin. But of those (practicing gays) who think homosexuality is natural and God-given - or that believe God's view of it even matters - I've not come across one I thought saved.

[melanie]

Melanie wrote:
If and when she gets married her Dad probably may not attend but she is choosing to love him and forgive him anyway.

Since you didn't go into detail about what your cousin's dad actually said or did, what exactly is she forgiving him for?

Forgiveness is a really interesting concept and discussion and vitaly important to the Christian way.
We often think that someone has to be justifiably wrong before forgiveness becomes necessary.
I thought this way for a very long time.
If I’ve done wrong, I’ll apologise.
Somewhere amoung the intricacies of life I realised how flawed that concept was. I was basing all my reasoning on my perception.
If I believed I’d done wrong, which for a stubborn, feisty girl was a really selfless step to being forgiving.
You’re wrong and I forgive you.
I could do that.
But that left so much unforgiveness. If I was basing it off what I thought I had to be sorry for then my personal perception was leaving the most difficult and hurtful situations raw and unresolved.
Should I forgive someone that maybe didn’t deserve it or when I cross examined the situation it shouldn’t even be a question?
For a long time I thought no.
Why should I say sorry for something or seek to forgive another for something that I didn’t perceive as wrong.
That concept flows both ways. If we are hurt by another and they believe their actions aren’t meant to be hurtful then should we forgive them?

The most active expression of love is forgiveness.
It’s a personal relevation and flows more so from the forgiver. It takes courage and compassion. It’s not easy.
I think regardless of when we strip apart the situation and access who is in the position of blame or whether it’s personally justifiable for someone to feel hurt by another if that person is willing to put forward forgiveness then it’s mending and even if it’s mending our own perception of the situation it’s to be celebrated.
We are forgiven by Jesus, although we don’t deserve it.
I find it not in tune to His teachings when we forgive only when we think we should because the premise of Christianity is to being forgiving even when we’re not worthy.

I'm sorry. I meant, what did she feel that he did wrong, that she feels anger or resentment about, that she feels she needs to forgive him?

Rick I know what you meant. It’s about the question of whether he did anything wrong to warrant forgiveness. His deed or her feelings.
My response was forgiveness isn’t about justification but about loving someone that the action or subsequent response isn’t the defining factor.
There have been many a time when someone overreacted and was offended by my actions. Or maybe they didn’t overreact and my perception is flawed either way someone is hurt. I still seek forgiveness not because I was wrong but because I love them. People think saying sorry is accepting ownership but it’s not. It’s about feeling empathy for either ourselves or another.
I’ve had times when people have said to me I forgive you and I’m like ‘yea nice that but I didn’t do anything wrong’. Completely disregarding the courage it took to choose love.
Now if someone is willing to forgive me I take that in the spirit it was intended. Its not about me but about accepting that they were hurt and have chosen to forgive. Accepting that forgiveness isn’t acknowledging my guilt but extending love.
So I think its irrelevant, who said what and felt whatever because love doesn’t pick apart it binds together.