So Hortense sent me a PM.

[RickD]

My mistake. He has been banned. I didn’t realize it when I said he wasn’t.

I’m not sure how he can get your email. You can try clicking on his name and send him an email that way.

[Kurieuo]

Is this good to have public, rather than be dealt with more privately?

There is also the pharisaical approach, and as I see Jesus' approach.

33 For John the Baptist has come peating no bread and drinking no wine, and you say, ‘He has a demon.’ 34 The Son of Man has come reating and drinking, and you say, ‘Look at him! A glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ 35 Yet wisdom is justified by all her children.”

That's obviously not to say Jesus was such, but rather His calling was to those who needed him. Clearly, as Horator even admitted, there are some things that went beyond. But, surely a more gracious approach would be appropriate rather than righteous judgement.

I'd kindly request, on Horator's behalf (though I've had little dealing with him), this thread be moved to the private mod forum out of public view. Hanging dirty laundry out whether mod or member does no one any good, and should be a private affair between those involved imo.

[Nessa]

I couldn't agree more, to be honest

[Philip]

The reason it first became public had to do with Ed wanting to exposing something very serious - as, at the time, I'm sure he was very concerned, not knowing how serious or dangerous it might have actually been. But I think it also offers some good lessons to others to really watch themselves in how they get worked up over those they disagree with - as it can lead to some really bad stuff. And for Christians, getting sucked into despising others based upon their beliefs or politics - that's another important caution and danger. IF, in a year (unless we decide to shorten it), Hortator wants to come back, he's certainly welcome (given his remorse and admittance) - and we might discuss whether to change his posting name so as to make him not feel "typed" or unforgiven for this unfortunate incident (not really sure if that's a bad idea or not, just thinking out loud).

[Nessa]

The fact that Ed wanted to expose something or someone is neither here or there.

I can understand why he wanted to make this public as he might have also been concerned for others. However, the best approach, as even advised many times by mods themselves, is to go to them first.

I personally think, given the remorse shown, a ban from being able to pm anyone for a long while (if that is possible) should have been given, after perhaps a months total ban.

I would personally be interested to know Ed's thoughts as well.

We should not string people's sins up on a moral noticeboard in any forum to teach anyone a listen, in my opinion.

[RickD]

I hear what you are saying, but for Heaven’s sake, the guy threatened Ed’s family.

This went beyond personal disagreements.

This went beyond what should be kept within the relative secrecy of the mod forum.

Just my opinion, fwiw.

[Philip]

Considering the very serious and potentially dangerous nature of someone you don't know threatening your family, going to them with reasonable talk as opposed to immediately exposing what has been done as a measure of safety is entirely reasonable. Ed had no idea, until the next day, what he was dealing with. As well, given the show of remorse and Ed's response, I left the door open for a lesser punishment - as what was first considered, until we had further data, was a lifetime ban. And if someone else learns from what can happen when we let our passions overtake us, then that's a good thing - and I'm pretty sure Hortator would be the first to admit it - probably wishing he'd had a such a reminder from someone else. But that doesn't mean there is a wish to continue holding this over his head or not forgiving - which is why I mentioned the possibility of him coming back with a fresh start using a new name. But it IS good for people to receive consequences ALONG WITH forgiveness. This was a very serious and dangerous thing that was done - and he has been let off with VERY minimal consequences and an opportunity to return.

Moderating is not easy, and we were put in a really bad position. And yet we let it cool down a day before we might have otherwise contacted Rich or whatever about a stated and ominous-sounding threat - which I'm glad we did wait. But whatever the case, it's not going to be debated here. This thread is locked!