Jac, I think the works of the kingdom are anything we are instructed in God's word to do. Love of course being the umbrella.
It is evident to me that you work hard. The question is whether it is through the spiritual power by God's grace, or by your own willpower. I would strongly suspect the former. I like what Paul said:
1Cr 15:10 But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but
I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me.
So the question is what mode you are in... the grace mode or the works mode? How do we know the difference? We check our attitudes. I don't need to tell you the story of Mary and Martha do I?
Seriously, it is a very tricky thing sometimes to know which mode we are in, because in the beginning of a works based mode it can give us great satisfaction with ourselves, AKA pride, that we can mistakenly equate with Joy and peace...but keep it up and the disappointment, dissatisfaction, and disgruntled feelings are not far behind.
Just my thoughts for what they are worth.
FFC
"Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable, and receives the impossible." - Corrie Ten Boom
Act 9:6
And he trembling and astonished said, Lord, what wilt thou have me to do?