PaulB007 wrote:August wrote:PaulB007 wrote:I won't lie, a lot of changes will need to be made. I am a terrible sinner. I have a child out of wedlock, a lot of sex out of wedlock.. ect. I am a man who operates on lust. Sex is my drug, I am terrible. I don't care what I do, I use others to my gain, I get what I want and then discard them. I lie compulsively, I use, I cheat.. you name it. And I do this more so than the normal person. I am not holding back out of fear of having to change my life to a more Christlike style, but afraid of giving it up for no reason if this is all fake.
If we don't believe that the love and grace of God is big enough to cover every possible sin that we commit, then we are all in very big trouble. None of us here are without sin. You may think that you are worse than any of us, but you are not. In the eyes of God we are all sinners, and He paid the price to cover all of our sins.
I am curious though, why would you consider keeping on doing those things if you know they are wrong, regardless of whether you are a Christian?
Well, because I've held to the atheist doctrine for a long time. I am a walking example. A lot of atheists will say how moral and upstanding they can be. Maybe some are, but I am one of those who literally says "If we all die in the end and have nobody to be accountable to, who gives a damn?" I might as well enjoy myself and feel good now while I can. While being a good guy and doing what feels right may be noble, its all simply wishful thinking. So why live by it if life is destined to end. Why hold myself to a moral code and restrain myself from pleasure? Why should I care about anyone else? I am not a sociopath because I do feel pain, emotion, I often times feel bad about what I do inside, but I almost consciously tell myself inside that it doesn't matter, nothing matters in the end. Some atheists may point out we should still be good for a numerous amount of reasons, but frankly if we all die and have nothing else, who gives a damn? Once my immediate family dies out I won't be remembered anyway. I lived by true atheist nature and rarely went out of my way for anyone for any reason and served only myself. Note that im not saying all atheists are horrible, but I fall right into you guys' description of how one should act if they would be to follow an atheist world view.
That's how I have always felt for awhile, only lately have I felt an urge to reconsider this stance and I can't explain why. Fear of death? Lack of direction in life? Holy Spirit maybe? It's so tough to say for sure. It's like I was just overcome over a period of time during these past two months, with an urge to find out the real truth. Keep in mind im only 22, most my age don't care about this stuff.
I do promise though, if I come to accept all of this I will change my life and I will start caring and I will do the right thing whenever I can.
Paul,
That's an admirable sentiment. The good news however, is that you don't have to change your life nor do you have to try to do the right things whenever you can. It's an inside job. Christ has accomplished it and when you share in that heritage what Christ has done is sufficient for salvation. Sure we then look to love Him and walk with Him, but that's our response to what He has already done. We will still stumble and fall. God's love for us is not dependent upon our performance in the past, now or in the future.
Look in the Bible at many of the people God loves and used. The future apostle, Saul persecuted the early church and was responsible for the deaths of many early believers. David, who was called a man after God's own heart committed adultery and ordered the husband of the woman he practically raped sent to the front lines to hide his sin and the child he conceived in that adultery. There is a prostitute in the lineage of Christ.
Sin is serious. I can well understand the pain you feel for your past. Even the forgiveness of God through Christ doesn't always eliminate the temporal consequences of our actions. God however is not the brooding, distant vengeful God that we often mistake Him to be. God himself came into the sphere of our existence in the person of Jesus Christ to provide everything we will ever need to be made right with Him. We are no longer slaves and servants who serve in fear and insecurity. When we accept the gift of Christ's salvation we are born again and adopted, bought with the most precious price ever paid to become sons and daughters of Christ. God may feel pain for what we have done in the past, not just for the affront of sin but also because God loves us and grieves for the pain we bring upon ourselves.
You're a father, albeit in difficult circumstances. We're imperfect. Yet even in our imperfection we can see a glimpse of the love our perfect father holds for us. His love is constant even when we are not. I have 5 children. I've been grieved and disappointed at times in things they have done, but I still love them and rejoice in them for the simple fact that they are my children and I seek to do the best for them I can.
Performance as a Christian is not the basis of our acceptablity to God. Nor is any sinner any better or any worse than any other in the eyes of God. He loves us and meets us where we are. How much easier is it to live without the worry of whether we'll be acceptable to God and earn his favor? Performance comes our of relationship. It's our response to God and has nothing to do with earning anything from Him.
I sense a lot of sorrow and regret in your words and they touch my heart. Repent. Grieve. But know that you don't have to pay God back for you've done in the past. Nobody ever could do that no matter how "good" we attempt to be. When we accept Christ and enter into the fullness of His love and the finished work of his incarnation, life, obedience, death and resurrection, the matter is settled and God looks upon us and sees the righteousness of Christ.
There's no freedom any more precious than to live and walk secure and know God as the loving Father that he is. It's sad that far too often, well intentioned Christians in a plethora of churches and denominations speak of Him and live as if He were Zeus looking down upon us from Olympus ready to hurl lightening bolts. Jesus in the parable of the prodigal son, tells us that His Father is not like that. He not only waits for us patiently to return, but when he sees us on the road far away, He runs toward us to receive us, love us and receive us back into right relationship with weeping, rejoicing and the deepest and greatest love.
There's nothing better in this life or the life to come that is any better.
blessings,
bart
Dogmatism is the comfortable intellectual framework of self-righteousness. Self-righteousness is more decadent than the worst sexual sin. ~ Dan Allender