I am back, I wanted to update you all.

[PaulB007]

Hello my friends. It's been awhile, I don't know if you remember me, but this site was my first taste for Christian apologetics. Then came Reasons to Believe (reasons.org). I have read books, articles, spent countless hours and days of reflection, and I feel that I just won't ever find enough proof on either side to totally satisfy me. One day I feel atheism tugging me into it's dark, hopeless door. The next, I feel Christianity pulling me back through it's light, hopeful door. I think in all honesty, I will Pascal wager this thing on God's side. I just don't see it working any other way. I totally agree with his logic. Win, and win big. Lose, lose everything. Maybe by attending Christian activities and worship, God will show his mercy and witness to the Holy Spirit the truth of the things I am hearing. I think that this religion makes the most sense, has the best facts and historical data, and that if one is true, this is it. I still have a lingering feeling my problem could be sin that I don't feel a connection to God. As I have stated before, I am a liar, a womanizer, a cheater, a conniver and a manipulator. I have convinced myself that these things are OK over the years, because my rationale is that if God does not exist, all things are permissible. I know a lot of other atheists may say you don't need God to be moral but to me, there is no point in being a moral, good person without God. My goal is personal survival at everyone elses expense. Why should I care without him? Reading this far you are probably thinking "Wow, what a monster!" and you're right, without God that's all I am. But it's not that I do not have a conscience. In fact, I feel all of these things telling me that they are the wrong thing to do even though I may enjoy doing the wrong things! Something inside tells me I am being a bad person! But I ignore it, because I don't see the point without an objective rule setter, God. It's tough for me to want to give up all my vices and sins, that's been the hardest part for me. I ask myself "Are you sure you want to miss out on all this fun and risk God not being real in the end?" That is my toughest struggle. Pascal's wager does make sense to me, but due to my impulsive, lustful desires it is hard to commit to the wager. I am going to give it an honest try I think. I will try to pray more to God, that's something I do. Pascal himself said that knowing God is far different than loving him.

What are some Christian thoughts on what I've said? (No atheist commentary please, I'd appreciate it. I already have discussed it with some and want to hear some positive insight.)

[B. W.]

Hello my friends. It's been awhile, I don't know if you remember me, but this site was my first taste for Christian apologetics. Then came Reasons to Believe (reasons.org). I have read books, articles, spent countless hours and days of reflection, and I feel that I just won't ever find enough proof on either side to totally satisfy me. One day I feel atheism tugging me into it's dark, hopeless door.

The next, I feel Christianity pulling me back through it's light, hopeful door. I think in all honesty, I will Pascal wager this thing on God's side. I just don't see it working any other way. I totally agree with his logic. Win, and win big. Lose, lose everything. Maybe by attending Christian activities and worship, God will show his mercy and witness to the Holy Spirit the truth of the things I am hearing.

I think that this religion makes the most sense, has the best facts and historical data, and that if one is true, this is it. I still have a lingering feeling my problem could be sin that I don't feel a connection to God. As I have stated before, I am a liar, a womanizer, a cheater, a conniver and a manipulator. I have convinced myself that these things are OK over the years, because my rationale is that if God does not exist, all things are permissible.

I know a lot of other atheists may say you don't need God to be moral but to me, there is no point in being a moral, good person without God. My goal is personal survival at everyone elses expense. Why should I care without him? Reading this far you are probably thinking "Wow, what a monster!" and you're right, without God that's all I am. But it's not that I do not have a conscience. In fact, I feel all of these things telling me that they are the wrong thing to do even though I may enjoy doing the wrong things!

Something inside tells me I am being a bad person! But I ignore it, because I don't see the point without an objective rule setter, God. It's tough for me to want to give up all my vices and sins, that's been the hardest part for me. I ask myself "Are you sure you want to miss out on all this fun and risk God not being real in the end?" That is my toughest struggle. Pascal's wager does make sense to me, but due to my impulsive, lustful desires it is hard to commit to the wager. I am going to give it an honest try I think. I will try to pray more to God, that's something I do. Pascal himself said that knowing God is far different than loving him.

What are some Christian thoughts on what I've said? (No atheist commentary please, I'd appreciate it. I already have discussed it with some and want to hear some positive insight.)

Welcome back!

Next let me address you in such manner that envokes your thought so you will ponder and seek the Lord...

First - sin is not individual. Sin does not consist in one single act. One sin is not greater than another.

Sin is a condition that produces acts. We think of each act as sin itself but true sin is the entire condition of the heart.

Jeremiah 17:9 states this truth. Christianity involves having a new heart place by God. A circumcision of the heart…

So look at sin as the entire condition of the heart always missing the mark, always blowing it, always manifesting individual fruit of sins you spoke of. Next, ask for the cure. Ask to endure the cutting process, take time in the recovery room, ask to be taught to walk a new path – you ask and seek the Lord who reveals the heart and is the master surgeon and healer…

You must look at sin as a condition, not as individual acts…

The rest, well, will come…
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