A lot to take in here. May take more than one post.
catherine wrote:The Holy Spirit is to bear witness with my spirit that the 'good news' is indeed true etc and the result of that is assurance, peace maybe.
Maybe?
Catherine, it could be that you are confused in some things regarding the HS, assurance, peace, etc, and how, when, and why we receive them. And just what it all is? According to the scriptures, when does one receive the HS?
How?
Why?
I know this can all be confusing, because there are certainly varying opinions on this, and just what it means. But the answers are there, for you.
Perhaps I've sinned too much and turned my back on God too many times and I can't receive the Holy Spirit? When I've gone to churches in the past year I've been hoping to 'meet' Jesus there, that is, know He is present in His Spirit. I even go to a Christian Book Shop in their cafe hoping He'll be there and help me.
Sinned too much? Catherine, do not believe that. That is lie straight from the devil. There is nothing in the gospel message to defend such a position.
How can the HS bear witness if you do not have it? And I am not saying that you don't. But taking in these things that you say,(at face value) indicates you have not heard His message and trusted Him. That is why I asked, "what does the gospel mean to you?" You didn't indicate it meant anything personally, only what you have heard it is supposed to mean.
-If you are 'going' places to meet Jesus, then you are making an error. Jesus is not in a building. He met Paul on a road. He met Moses in a Bush. Peter in a boat. And the list goes on.
catherine wrote:
I don't know if it's God or my own longing that keeps 'drawing me' to seek Him. If it was God drawing me, why doesn't the Holy Spirit give me assurance? I came across this verse yesterday: 1 Thess 1:5:
'''For when we brought you the Good News, it was not only with words but also with power, for the Holy Spirit gave you full assurance that what we said was true.''
I've been told the 'Good News' that the Living God sent His only Son to come and save us, so that we can be free from sin, suffering and death and can live with Him in paradise forever, in love, peace and unimaginable joy. I believe this is really good news. I hear the 'words' and I've seen and felt 'power' but I've not been given 'full assurance' that what I've heard is true (and not just a story).
Sure, that is what you've been told. But what does it mean to you?
Why does Catherine need saving? Do you believe that you need saving?
The only time I felt 'assurance' was when I was 14/15 and I was studying the Bible with the Jehovah's Witnesses. I remember feeling relieved that I was going to survive Armageddon and live on the paradise earth. I didn't really have any major doubts at that time. As I progressed with the study I wasn't happy with some of their doctrines and I left. Also I couldn't live a 'perfect life' and I wanted to have a boyfriend and do lots of bad things. When I left I immediately 'felt' unsaved and knew I'd be destroyed at Armageddon. Ive never had the same 'assurance' I felt back then. I know I was young back then and so the 'feeling' I felt then was probably the same as I used to feel when I prayed to Mary or a Saint (I was brought up a Roman Catholic til about 12). You are more trusting and accepting when you are young. Anyway, this verse in 1 thess 1:5 is very powerful in what it is claiming. I pray that this verse will apply to me. I feel very 'low' today and feel like 'chucking it all in'. Why does God not answer me?
This is a darn good example of why we should not rely on feelings. You know that JW's are a cult and preach a false gospel. Yet you 'felt' assurance. I am sure there are Muslims, Buddhist, etc. that feel certain they are right. After all there are Muslims willing to blow themselves up because they are so SURE of their faith. What do their feelings, that they are right, have to do with truth? Very little. It is apparent to me that God has given you some spiritual clarity to recognize such. It sounds as if you are sure that JWs are wrong. And how could you be sure, unless there were something objectively right to measure it against. As far as God answering you. I would only warn that to get the right answers we must ask the right questions. Further, I would say that God has been and is answering you. It could be a matter of static. There is obviously a lot that has gone on in your past, that is interferring with your reception, so to speak.
Also, I am not sure how you are understanding 1 Thess 1:5 to apply in your situation. Can you clarify?
It is very important when going to the scripture to make sure that we rightly divide the word of truth. Grabbing verses here or there out of context, is only going to further confuse the matter, and leave you frustrated.
Catherine, please keep talking, and we'll try and walk this thing out.
My closet is my church. If you don't feel comfortable praying openly in public then pray in your closet. It's about having a relationship with Christ, not other people.
Danny, not to be rude, but that is just bad advice. Christ was all about others. His command was to love one another. Yes, it is about our relationship with Christ. No question. But in no way does that exclude others. Not in any way.