hatsoff wrote:There were several important factors that led to my eventual rejection of Christ. One of them is as follows: When I was a teenager, my parents and some of the congregants at my church told me that we cannot prove God, but that we must have faith. I misinterpreted this* as meaning that there is no objectively rational reason to believe in God, much less the Christian God. At the same time, though, I had an unwavering (initially) conviction that God was real, and that his Holy Spirit was at work in the church. So, I turned to the Scriptures, and misinterpreted them, too. I concluded from a few comments by Paul, in particular Ep 2:8, that belief in God is itself is a gift from the Holy Spirit. In other words, the Holy Spirit, I reasoned, must be at work in me, causing me to believe in the saving power of Christ. I came to understand that the Holy Spirit was believing for me, and through me.
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*- As it turns out, they didn't mean what I thought they meant. In later conversations with my parents, for example, they insisted that we can know God through personal experience, and through creation. But at the time, I misunderstood them to mean that we must have blind faith if we are to have faith at all.
Touching on some of your thoughts quoted here, I strongly believe God chooses to remove the darkened veil to those whom He chooses to reveal Himself more clearly to. Many of the Christian posters here I dare say have an immediate awareness to God in their life and His existence in the world around them. I am not talking necessarily of a mystical experience, but rather a spiritual perception. This would explain why when Christians look at the world they see evidence for God all the way through it, whereas when a non-Christian/Atheist looks at the world they see absolutely no evidence. A well known theologian Jonathan Edwards believed certain moral and spiritual qualifications were required to appreciate the force of evidence for religious truths. Another theologian, William Wainright, building on top of Edwards' beliefs puts it down the "properly disposed heart" being required to appreciate God in the world.
Re: proving God, nothing can be proved. There is only evidence or lack of evidence and we are each the judge of whether evidence proves something or not enough for us to believe. Many theologians and philosophers believe the evidence for God proves His existence. This now even includes Anthony Flew who wrote a favourite paper of many atheists - The Presumption of Atheism. Likewise, many secular philosophers believe there is no significant evidence to warrant or justify belief in God's existence. The two sides are both rationally at a standstill with each other. One side trying to make the other see the evidence they see, while the other side claims there is no real evidence. Thus, there seems to me much merit to Wainright's ideas of a "properly disposed heart".
That said, I myself identify a "properly disposed heart" as a willingness to believe, and proactiveness in actively seeking God whether through reason, the heart, or a mix of the two. This aligns to Christ who said, "For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened” (Lk 11:10). When the door opens, that is when a full disclosure happens, perhaps akin the personal experiences of which your parents' speak, Newton's "once was blind, but now I see" in his Amazing Grace song, and enlightening experiences many other Christians claim to have had.
I am not sure how this works with yourself. Perhaps you did clearly see God, and clear evidence for God in the world, only to then loose that perception as your heart for some reason or another hardened. Or perhaps you did not really perceive God in the world at all beyond your family and church upbringing, teachings and experiences. Perhaps you don't even really know yourself. Maybe my comments can in some way help make sense of your spiritual journey (or anti-spiritual journey???).
I wish to also comment on "faith". I always find it interesting that despite what many Christians advocate, Scripture presents "faith" as something to be had after evidence is provided. A biblical faith is never blind, but rather based on evidence. If one has faith in Christ based on a blind faith, then their faith is in my opinion empty. Some Christians would protest I am sure, but I'm not questioning the sincerity of the belief of such Christians, but rather basing it on my understanding of
biblical faith which is based on evidence and reason. How else are Christians meant to give a reason for the hope that is within them to those who ask? (1 Peter 3:15) Those who would protest against me no doubt see it the other way around, that is, those who have a blind faith have the strongest faith to be desired, and those who believe due to evidence or reasoning of some sort have little faith. Yet, I find little to support this Scripturally. Paul even tells us to test
everything, hold onto the good (1 Thess 5:21). Hopefully this places a different spin on your understanding of "faith" with regards to Christianity.
So I believe there is strong evidence for God and that is why I have faith. In a way, I have a similar journey to yours where I questioned Christianity. Only, I asked God to reveal Himself to me, and expecting a mystical supernatural revelation of some sort, instead I was given reason after rational reason to believe to the point I cannot deny even if I wanted to. I'm not sure how I can help Atheists see however, because of their improper disposition. I figure the Holy Spirit works on this, and helps change our disposition, to the point we are able to make some clear decision to believe in or ignore God. I sincerely hope your decision is not final. It would be heartbreaking considering your life's journey. But somehow, I don't think your decision is final. Whether or not I am wrong, I perceive there to be some glimmer in your words here which indicate your decision is not final. Once it is though, you will just become more and more hardened against Christ and it will be harder if not impossible for the truth to be seen. Of course, this is assuming what I believe is true.
....oh yeah, I would throw in some endless torture for you too. 
