Hi folks. I joined the message board a couple of days ago. This is my testimony:
I was brought up as a Catholic, although my parents where both rather
nominal, their only church attendance being Christmas and Easter. I was
christened, confirmed and all that, but didn't really have an
understanding of what I was meant to believe. By the time i was about
fourteen, I had 'invented' a kind of belief system that I could feel
comfortable with. It was a kind of pantheistic nature worship; very
imaginative
!(it involved me evolving into a kind of godhood. I
later found out it wasn't a new idea).
At sixteen I got involved with a youth group run by the Catholic
Church called Genesis 2, which brought me into a more Christian
atmosphere, taught me a little bit about the bible and Jesus, and
generally helped me along through the latter part of adolescence.
Disaster struck when I was eighteen. Desperate to find work, I left
home in Scotland and moved to England where I got a job as a nurse. I
had some money, was far from parental restraint, and was rather
emotionally immature and a bit (big bit) insecure, so I started
drinking, doing very occasional drugs etc. Got myself a girlfriend and
lived with her for quite a while. During this time I also discovered the
occult. I think that I was just a spiritual searcher, and that's what I
found. I started doing tarot and meditation, got into all sorts of bad
sexual stuff, looked into Buddhism and hinduism, finally started
reading about witches and 'magic' etc. I even bumped into another nurse
working at the same hospital who described herself as a 'white witch' (I
don't know if she really was or not, but knowing a thing or two about
spiritual warfare, she probably was).
I became depressed, drank more heavily, started having paranoid
thoughts and aggressive episodes. By the time I was twenty-one, I was a
wreck, holding onto my job and my sanity by the skin of my teeth.
Another student nurse called Rachel, who was going out with one of
my mates, invited me to come along to her church and I, being
open-minded and loftily enlightened, condescended to go with her.
The week that followed was hellish. I suffered night-terrors, I
despised myself and everyone stupid enough to associate with me, and
ended up going off by myself with the intention of committing suicide.
I didn't, obviously.
In fact, somehow, Rachel got me back to the church. This was a
pattern for several weeks, and then one Sunday, the pastor made an altar
call, and without knowing how it happened (and I really do mean I have
absolutely NO conscious memory of making the decision), I found myself
standing up and responding to Jesus.
As a footnote, a couple of weeks later, when my life was getting
back on an even keel, I was riding my motorbike home from work, thinking
about Jesus and what He was doing, when I found myself giggling. Then I
started laughing, and eventually I was laughing so hard, I had to stop
and get off at the side of the road. I lay on the ground laughing
helplessly, with tears rolling down my face, rolling about and holding
my sides. This went on for about ten minutes and then gradually died
off. I didn't know what it was at the time, but I knew God was involved,
and I felt as though I had laughed a whole load of spiritual sickness
out of my body, because I felt clean. I now know that this was a baptism
in the spirit experience (and I don't really care if that sounds
unscriptural to some).
Here's my favourite joke about Christians:
Little Girl. "Mom, do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'?
Mom. "No dear, some begin with; 'When I became a Christian, all my
troubles where over!'
That about sums it up for me. Bless you chaps