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Need some advice..

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2005 10:10 pm
by jakelo
Hi everyone, I need a little advice on what I should do. One of my friends, whom I have known for over 2 years and has become one of my best friends is agnostic. He claims to have an open mind and he claims to leave open the possibility that a god exists. But hes so disrespectul towards my Christian beliefs. I have honestly never tried to make fun of him or try to insult his beliefs but on a few occasions I guess he felt the need to make fun of my beliefs, even infront of our other friends (you wouldn't believe the horrible things he says towards God). Well, I decided to stop talking to him because its hard for me to be around someone thats so disrespectful towards me and my beliefs. But recently he asked me why I stopped talking to him and I had to remind him of what he did. He seems to be sorry about what happened and he said he didn't want to stop being friends over that. But something inside me is just telling me he'll do something like that again. I don't know what I should do. I know I should forgive him, which I have. But I want to seperate myself from someone/something that bothers me as much as he did. I don't know what I should do. I'm sure if i didn't talk to him anymore, it would cause problems with our other friends one way or another. I'm stuck, can anyone give me some advice?

RE:

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2005 11:11 pm
by Ark~Magic
Jakelo, since you forgave him, give him another chance. If he keeps doing these things, I'd suggest staying away from him. But try and be an example on him and give him another chance, just as Christ would. Pray God will teach him to be respectful and understanding and to open his eyes to God's grace and mercy and truth.

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2005 11:14 pm
by Kurieuo
If it were me, I'd lay it straight that your beliefs are closely related to who you are, and so when he mocked them he mocked you. He may have said he does not want to stop being friends over "that", but even this implies that your beliefs aren't important (i.e., being portrayed as "that" in an unimportant sense). And so your opinions or beliefs are again being classified as unimportant and disrespected.

The qualities of your friend are quite familiar in some non-Christians, and I am related to such people who have done as your friend has done. They claim they don't know, then whenever issues come up especially relating to Christianity, they think they know it all as anything said favourably of God or Christ they will just scoff at, argue against, glim over, or ignore. They're disinterested, and their words are always changing and contradictory, which says to me their words on such issues are meaningless and just act as smokescreens. What can you do? Well good to leave communications open, and be aggressive with sticking up for your beliefs especially when attacked. I think being aggressive in this way is not bad, for it lets your friends know that a) they crossed a boundary by insulting your beliefs; and b) you really do believe in what your convicted of. And if they begin ridiculing you for your beliefs, well what good friends you have. *sarcasm*

Kurieuo.

Posted: Tue Aug 16, 2005 1:55 am
by Deborah
I personally find that when someone attacks ones person beliefs it is indeed a personal attack and is very disrespectful. Remind him that in friendship one does not disrespect ones friends or what tey stand for.

Posted: Tue Aug 16, 2005 4:41 pm
by jakelo
Thanks everyone for the advice. I'm definitely paying attention. We'll see what happens in a few days :).