Hey guys, sorry it's been a while for me. You know, long time listener, don't post much...
Anyway, I need some advice about this girl that I just started dating. She really has lots of great qualities, and we aren't serious yet or anything like that, but I see a problem coming up in the future. You see, she is Catholic, and I am quite non-denominational. Now, don't get me wrong, I have a lot of respect for Catholics and regard them as fellow Christians, in fact over half of my family is devout Catholic.
My fear is that this respect will not reciprocate back to me, that she will not see me as on equal theological footing, and will eventually expect my "conversion". (or worse, be force to break up with me)
Is this problem really as bad as it seems to me? Perhaps I am overanalizing since we aren't serious YET...I just worry since I always saw myself with a fellow evangelical!
If she beleives in the Christ of the Bible as you do, and honestly seeks the face of God, you are already way!! ahead of the game.
If there are Truths that still need to be dealt with, you can only be a positive influence on her, and her Love of the Truth, with active seeking and your support, well, what can we say? Possible match made in heaven?
Peace be to you and the knowledge and wisdom of the Lord guide and strengthen you on your way.
You'll be in my prayers, but here's the practical advice I have for you (considering I just went through a situation that was, though not the same, in some respects similar to what you are facing):
1) Make sure that you are in God's will for your own life. You have to realize that it absolutely DOES NOT MATTER what you want. In the end, you only want one thing, which is to follow His will for your life. If He wants it to work with her, then you do whatever it takes. If He doesn't, then don't waste your time or hers. Now, He may not tell you immediately . . . it may take several months for Him to give you a definite one way or the other. But, in the end, what you pray for is for Him to reveal His will to you--no more, and no less.
2) Find out where she is with her own life in relationship to (1). If God tells both of you that you are "the one" for each other (whether you believe in that or not, we all believe that God has a will for certain situations!), then you can work it out. If she is agreeable, then picture your relationship as a triangle with God at the top. If you want to grow closer together, then you both have to be growing closer to God.
3) Don't be afraid to talk the issue out. Think about the long term ramifications of any decision. Here's the big issue: as hard as it is, don't make any decision based on emotions. Look at it rationally. Will it work? That's one of the ways you'll know what God is saying, along with the confirmation or rejection from other people. If you and she just have very, very different ideas, it may not be possible. Or maybe you both have different ideas, but neither of you feel it is incredibly important to base your relationship on those. I know of couples who are Catholic/Protestant and it works, simply because religion isn't focused on in the home. Of course, you'll have to consider kids . . .
What I'm saying, and I would say this to her, too, even while I believe that Catholicism is simply wrong, don't "convert" just because of how you feel for her. That can create massive long-term issues, and relationships are hard enough without all that.
In the meantime, just have fun with her. If you aren't serious yet, then there is no need to stress yourself out over possibilities. Who knows . . . maybe God will work it out. Just don't make any commitments right now and play it by ear.
Lastly, continue to do exactly what you are doing. The wise man seeks counsel, and you should be seeking a lot of it. Pray, of course, and don't look for "the magic answer." This is going to be a God thing. Something, somewhere is going to have to give. You both need to let God decide what that something is, because if YOU make that decision, I can almost guarantee you it will be the wrong thing.
I hope this helps,
God bless
Proinsias wrote:I don't think you are hearing me. Preference for ice cream is a moral issue
And that, brothers and sisters, is the kind of foolishness you get people who insist on denying biblical theism. A good illustration of any as the length people will go to avoid acknowledging basic truths.
You guys are great. I really appreciate prayers, thoughts and advice. Normally I would never actively pursure such a relationship but you see, she asked ME out (something that simply never happens) and I can tell she really likes me.
I think I really do need to let God handle this, for you are right, my own desires mean nothing. If I seek only my own pleasures, then I will reap nothing.
BTW, KMart, you are my favorite forum member. I love reading your...refreshing...rebuttals to foolish atheists. However I don't think I will be running just yet, at my own peril of course...
