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Hello I am new here

Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 8:15 pm
by Deborah
Hello
I am new to the board. My name is Deborah and I am still trying to find my way after a near death experience 7 months ago.
One could say that my faith was dormant, with the experience came a flicker. After researching and studying I found that science proved the possibility of God, and my faith started to grow. Since then I have continued to research and study and my faith has continued to grow.
Two weeks ago I joined my first Church in almost 20 years, and my husband and children chose to go with me.

Re: Hello I am new here

Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 8:20 pm
by Kurieuo
Hi Deborah,

Welcome. I think these boards could do with a few more women, and your spiritual journey sounds particularly interesting so I hope we get to hear more :).

Kurieuo.

Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2005 8:31 pm
by Prodigal Son
welcome! pretty cool story.

Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 6:36 pm
by Deborah
I had a rough trot for quit a few years, with the deaths of 3 close friends and two of my grandparents a relatively short period of my life. So I guess you could say that was when my faith started to waver, so much pain and I couldn't handle it. But I dragged myself through it, but was far from being healed.
Around two years ago I found out I have a cancer, it was situated under my eye, and because of this a plastic surgeon had to remove it. I ended up on a waiting list, and I did not understand why I was on a waiting list, no one had bothered to explain. I rang monthly for a while to be told I am on a waiting list. This tortured me. I remember thinking but cancer kills I had suffered depression for many years, but I had always managed to find my way back, but this time I was well and truly lost, and I could not find my way. I stopped ringing and fell deeper into depression.
The one day about 7 months ago, I don't know what happened no one has been able to explain it. Suddenly I could not even draw a breath, I remember feeling terror and it seemed to go on, then just as suddenly I felt a present and was able to walk to my son at the other end of the house to get help. Afterwards all I could do was lay there still for what seemed like hours. I didn't speak I just felt a huge feeling that I can only imagine was humble. Took me many months to recognize that possibly that feeling was humble, I had never experienced such a feeling before in my life. I know that during the time I lay there I was completely at peace with everything and myself. I came away with new beliefs and a perhaps flickering faith. I have never been the same since, but I know it took weeks for me to admit it to myself let alone anyone else. Truthfully I was afraid that they would call me Looney. But then I just had to admit that I had felt something, still shaken I started researching, I started with science and found that science proved the possibility of God. But I did not stop there I kept researching science for months and while I did that my faith strengthened. I have only started reading the bible in the last 3 weeks and have finished the New Testament and am into the old. I am prepared to read and study and research for the rest of my life to come to some understanding.
A Buddhist friend of mine asked me what is it you think God wants from you, I replied without thinking that I believed god wants me to learn to love humanity and him with all my heart and he provides the steps for us to learn to do this through his bible.
My trial is not over because I found god, out of this experience I came away with the knowledge that I would be ok but it would not be a walk in the ballpark.
The experience gave me the kick in the bum I needed to try and phone them one more time and this time they admitted they lost my referral between the surgery and the hospital, less than a week later I was face to face with the surgeon who would remove the cancer and that same surgeon who a week later told me they got it all. But it had grown twice the size in the time I had waited. With this news I really thought I would be ok, but my depression didn't't leave this time and I struggled with it. Until before Christmas I found myself at the end, I almost lost total control, I remember the day I went for help, I was so terrified of hurting my children that I contemplated hurting or killing myself, not sure which it was but that hit me hard and I locked myself in the bathroom, a friend came and we left for the Doctor immediately. So my journey has been a rocky one, but I have made it this far.

What most stands out from my experience is the feelings or terror then humble. I feel confident that with the intervention that occurred witch I believe was god sent, I feel sure that I wouldn't be here today.

Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 7:31 pm
by Anonymous
God wants you to know His love! I'm practically speechless from reading your story.

Romans 8
28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

\0/Praising God for his mercy and grace\0/,
Mandi

Posted: Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:08 pm
by Deborah
I am looking for fellow christians to add to msn

brandysnaps67@hotmail.com

thanks

Posted: Fri Jan 28, 2005 9:39 pm
by Mastermind
I added you. I'm the dude who usually uses Sith faces as his display pic.

Posted: Wed Feb 02, 2005 11:04 pm
by Anonymous
sith?

Posted: Thu Feb 03, 2005 6:12 pm
by Mastermind
Never seen Star Wars?