Evidence for God from Science

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips
to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring
and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife
is like most women - she loved to browse.

Yesterday, my dear wife received the following letter from the local
Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Samsel,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have
been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints
against
Mr. Samsel are listed below and are documented by our video
surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
people's carts when they weren't looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away. '

4. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
M&M's
on layaway.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets
from the bedding department.

7. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him, he began
crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

8. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as
a mirror while he picked his nose.

9. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

10. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly
humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

11. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna
look' by using different sizes of funnels.

12. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

13. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES
AGAIN!'

And last, but not least,


14. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here!'

Very funny. My favorite:

9. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

I like number 8, and 11 too.

I'd like to add, though, that I was in the grocery store the other day and this guy was taking absolutely forever in the cheese department. Women aren't the only one's who compare prices and such. But I'm sure you know that . . .

cslewislover wrote:

I like number 8, and 11 too.

I'd like to add, though, that I was in the grocery story the other day and this guy was taking absolutely forever in the cheese department. Women aren't the only one's who compare prices and such. But I'm sure you know that . . .

Just to be honest about men supposedly hating to shop, here is the the truth:

I like to fish and I enjoy archery as well so..I go to these shops as often as I need to and probably more than I should.

Whether it is Wal-Mart's sports department or the aboved mentioned places(and others) you can believe this; There is no shortage of men who love to shop.
I have watched as most of them go up and down each and every aisle checking out everything that is there. Some, if not most, will return to the aisles or even go over the entire store again.

These men who hate to shop will check the price, scrutinize every facet of the items of interest(which is usually all items) and then ponder whether to buy it.
You can substitute any type of sports shop you like,it's always the same. They will stay in there for hours!

Now, if you don't believe this, please allow me to give proof.

I make custom fishing lures(spinnerbaits) and sell them to shops within a hundred miles or so around where I live. These baits are quite expensive to the consumer compared to other spinnerbaits throughout the market.

One day in particular, I took an order to a very successful retailer and there were several fishermen in there talking and browsing.
I walked up to the desk and handed the package to the owner so he would be sure the order was correct.

In just a few minutes there were several men who hate to shop standing around asking about the lures.
I was surprised at the reaction from a bunch of burly, hard-nosed fishermen and how they responded as the owner and I showed them the product. Some of these guys were the size of a
small pickup truck. There were more and louder oooo's and ahaaa's each time one of us pulled out a new color and/or size. Honestly, you couldn't have had a better, more thrilled, group of shoppers even with teenage girls in the most fabulous shoe store in the world.

I know...I'm going to get castigated for this but it's true-MEN LOVE TO SHOP!

Cross.eyed wrote:In just a few minutes there were several men who hate to shop standing around asking about the lures.
I was surprised at the reaction from a bunch of burly men and how they responded as the owner and I showed them the product. There were more and louder oooo's and ahaaa's each time one of us pulled out a new color and/or size. Honestly, you couldn't have had a better, more thrilled, group of shoppers even with teenage girls in the most fabulous shoe store in the world.

I know...I'm going to get castigated for this but it's true-MEN LOVE TO SHOP!

Thanks for writing this, because I BELIEVE IT. I am always amazed, too, when I encounter a couple of guys at the park, sitting down and talking, and they sound "just like women." Same thing in restaurants. It seems to me that for a lot of men, they clam up around women because they think they're supposed to or something. Maybe I'll also get into trouble.

I've also noticed that in Japanese society, say, a man can say how "cute" something is and it's OK, because the next thing he's doing is getting his sword out and chopping someone up (lol).

Thank you and I do appreciate your support.

I'm thinking after a few of our brothers read this I'm gonna need your help.

Cross.eyed wrote:Thank you and I do appreciate your support.

I'm thinking after a few of our brothers read this I'm gonna need your help.

Lol. Anytime. I've got my pink nunchucks at the ready.

cslewislover wrote:

Cross.eyed wrote:Thank you and I do appreciate your support.

I'm thinking after a few of our brothers read this I'm gonna need your help.

Lol. Anytime. I've got my pink nunchucks at the ready.

Well get 'em warmed up before someone comes after us with a poopy mop!

I like to shop if it's for interesting stuff, like CDs or video games.

I hate shopping. I like to get in, buy my stuff and get out.

It looks like I'm more manly then you lot! Which is ironic, considering...

I only seriously shop when I'm looking to buy something in particular. Otherwise it is in and out.

Harry12345 wrote:I hate shopping. I like to get in, buy my stuff and get out.

It looks like I'm more manly then you lot! Which is ironic, considering...

Harry12345 wrote:I hate shopping. I like to get in, buy my stuff and get out.

It looks like I'm more manly then you lot! Which is ironic, considering...

I like it Harry.......uh... at least I think so.