Gman wrote:
Gab, can I ask you a personal question? Do you ever watch horror movies or read horror books?
Thanks,
G -
Good Question, but no luck, as I find that kind of thing boring, but you were wise to ask. I know why I am having night mares, well most of them anyway, but I just can't get them to stop. I have a variety of night mares and I may share them on the board, I don't know yet, but I will tell you one of the ones I have had between the others. It has to do with my mothers death. You see I watched her die before my very eyes, and well....
I can never forget that day... it was the 4th of July, a day I don't celebrate anymore, she died by a massive heart attack brought on by her lungs and kidneys filling with fluid, she tried to get help, to grab a near by phone next to her bed, but she couldn't, my dad woke up to see her, convulsing and gagging and then, stillness, I didn't see all of it, but I watched her being taken out of the house, the look on her face.... and she was still alive, still suffering, you could see her trying to live.... we didn't want her to suffer. Well ever since then I have nightmares about it in a different way. See the night she died she had asked me to stay up with her and scratch her back, she had a lot of diseases and one of them made her itch a lot and she couldn't sleep. I told her no, I had to work the next morning. Well I told her good night and that I loved her, all she said was good night... Now I will have dreams of her off and on, laying on a hospital bed with doctors trying to save her one moment, and then the next, I am holding her heart in my hand and there is blood everywhere, and I am standing there in front of her, and she has that look on her face
like I betrayed her.... she is laying there dead.... and there is nothing I can do! The docs are gone, and she is looking at me with those eyes... she was the only human that had remotely loved me. Had I stayed up that night she could have lived, maybe they could have helped her if I had just been there... I was so helpless the day she died... there was nothing I could do. After she was gone I had no one to comfort me or give me love, they helped my bros cause they acted out, and my sis too cause she was young, but I couldn't get them to help me, it was like they didn't take me seriously. She couldn't give me much love, she was too sick all of the time and with four kids and my dad she just couldn't be with us all. I cherished every moment with her... and I will never get another one again
My family then began to play the blame game and fight over money too and life just fell apart from there, and ever since then those nightmares happen from time to time.... when I am not having the other ones.
Fortunately I have someone who loves me and cares about me and has been talking with me about this for a while, and she has helped me a lot with it, just listening and comforting me. It is still very painful, and even now is hard to write about, but I am glad I have her as if she hadn't helped me with this and much more I wouldn't be alive today, I would have died of all the pain I had kept in. Thank you Vicki
You are too good for words!
That is just a bit of the nightmares I have, like I said, there are more and they are very very disturbing and well I might put them on the board, IDK but there you have one. I know the reasons I have nightmares, I just want them to stop.
zoegirl wrote:HOwever, stress can also affect sleep, so can medical issues.
When I was very sick, I also had the worst sleep.
First and foremost, you have struggled with being sick. I would be cautious about interpreting anything when your physical state has been compromised.
I guess the line of questioning should be
1) What have you tried non-medically (exercise, prayer, milk...before sleep?)
2) Have you tried anything medicinal? (sleep-aids)?
3) What is their frequency?
4) Do they tend to have some relevance to something that happened during that day or week? (not asking for details here, for instance, if I have had an awful thing happen that day or I am anticipating something, I will have the awful dream about it.)
or
5)Are they about things that are totally irrelevant to day-day events
6) Do they tend to occur at a certain time during the night?
7) Can you remember the dreams or are they more vague terror feelings
are you on a good sleep schedule? (going to bed same time, full 8 hours)
It's not unheard of for adults to struggle with nightmares.
1) Nothing really, I pray each night but not about sleep, just that the Lord keeps me and holds me close. Okay and a glass of milk with cookies upon occasion!
2)No, that stuff never worked when I was younger so I decided they were worthless, lol
3)Nearly every night with different one aside from the ones with my mother which are always the same...
4)No, aside from my mother, they are just like being tortured and seeing things that now I can't get out of my head no matter what I do.
5)Yes
6)Not sure, I go to sleep and don't really notice, but I can't wake up from them either and they feel very real.
7)I can remember them quite well, I wish I couldn't, but... well I can
and the terror is always there even when I wake up...
8.) Yes, about 5am here (I work a late job but these dreams have been going on for a very long time since before that, but not before my mother died so I don't know how much she plays into it all)
I will answer the other questions later okay? Jlay, about taking notes, you are not the first to have said that, and yet I ignored it before, but you make a good point about that. A lot of them are not related to my family or mother in anyway and I should write them down and see why I am having them. Maybe if I post them you all can help me out. Not sure if they have to deal with future events, I have had a few like that and some have come true, but that is a whole other topic and those were not nightmares. My nightmares are just torture, I would rather be water-boarded than have those night mares!!!!
Thank you all for your help, and prayers, God Bless! If you need to know anything just ask or pm me. I prefer the board though