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Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 4:12 pm
by Big Al
Where do you guys stand on the topic of masturbation. I have seen evidence that says it is ok from a biblical standpoint and testimonies from people that say it can really [love you] up. What is your opinion?

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 6:46 pm
by Danieltwotwenty
Hi Big Al
I am kind neutral on the subject, but since becoming a Christain i no longer feel the need to do so.
I would rather save myself for my wife.
I am interested to see both sides of the argument though.
Just a thought, masturbation is only about lust and not love so i guess it would be sinful?? maybe??

Your Friend in Christ
Daniel

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 9:01 pm
by Big Al
Danieltwotwenty wrote:Hi Big Al
I am kind neutral on the subject, but since becoming a Christain i no longer feel the need to do so.
I would rather save myself for my wife.
I am interested to see both sides of the argument though.
Just a thought, masturbation is only about lust and not love so i guess it would be sinful?? maybe??

Your Friend in Christ
Daniel
I agree with you on remaining neutral on the subject but one argument was that it didn't have to involve lustful thoughts but just a means of "relieving sexual tension." I also read that some Protestant theologians said it was alright. Here is one of their quotes,
"Masturbation can be a healthy, enjoyable way for a person without a sexual partner to experience sexual gratification. Since God has created humans as sexual beings, masturbation provides a way for individuals to experience their sexuality and meet their sexual needs. (p. 246)

Jesus warns that lust leads to adultery, and adultery is sin. However, lusting is not the same as fantasizing ...

Fantasies about future possibilities are usually benign.... Desiring a specific person, and directing on ways to fulfill the desire, is a form of lust. Fantasy, on the other hand, is more general and does not include attempts at achieving that exact fantasy." (p. 247)

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 12:47 am
by Canuckster1127
I think it falls into a similar category as eating meat offered to idols. Each person needs to follow their own conscience. I don't believe it's always wrong. I think a lot of it has to do with whether it's tied to a pattern of lust or ideation that become addictive or habit forming, which for some people it does. For some who have issues in this area, complete abstinence is a good idea. For others, it's not necessarily an issue. Best just to keep one's eyes on Christ and work it out individually.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 10:18 am
by jlay
Big Al,
Where you from?

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 11:20 am
by Big Al
Jlay,
Why do you want to know where I'm from? y:-?

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2011 10:23 am
by jlay
Because I know a Big Al from Tennessee.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2011 10:06 pm
by Big Al
Yeah I'm not from Tennessee.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 3:34 pm
by Murray
If your half asleep and do to get to sleep I truley do not think it would be to much of an issue, but I mean doing it randomly and without reason other than lust I can see a bit of "lust of the flesh" sin going on.

The other thing is , "cronic" masterbation can lead to unhealthy social lives, so , you know, to much of somethin is bad.

So my stance is , to get to sleep sure, other than that , I guess its ok as long as its not daily :econfused:

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:11 am
by Reactionary
I see that I agree with most of you guys. I don't see it as a big issue, the only danger is if you become addicted to it, or if it affects your everyday life. People shouldn't exaggerate with anything, be it sports, TV, Internet, even oxygen could be harmful if you breathe it like crazy. As for masturbation in general, I think it's relatively OK if you realize that your fantasies are exactly that - fantasies, which are separated from reality and shouldn't adversely affect your relationship with the opposite sex.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 7:10 am
by Murray
Reactionary wrote:I see that I agree with most of you guys. I don't see it as a big issue, the only danger is if you become addicted to it, or if it affects your everyday life. People shouldn't exaggerate with anything, be it sports, TV, Internet, even oxygen could be harmful if you breathe it like crazy. As for masturbation in general, I think it's relatively OK if you realize that your fantasies are exactly that - fantasies, which are separated from reality and shouldn't adversely affect your relationship with the opposite sex.

I do have a question however as I've thought about this more.

1) Isnt it lust of the flesh

2) we can sin in our thoughts against others correct? So would't thinking lustfully be a sin as well?

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 7:27 am
by Reactionary
Murray wrote:I do have a question however as I've thought about this more.

1) Isnt it lust of the flesh

2) we can sin in our thoughts against others correct? So would't thinking lustfully be a sin as well?
Good question. I think we need to precisely define "thinking lustfully" in order to get an answer. I think fantasizing doesn't necessarily involve lust, especially if you have no intention of turning it into reality. The problem is if you prefer masturbation over a real relationship, or if you become addicted to it. A bit of imagination is mostly harmless, I believe that once you know how to differ the realm of reality from the realm of imagination, you have no problems. However, that's just my view. I would definitely like to see more opinions.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2011 12:22 pm
by jlay
Reactionary,

How would you interpret this verse.
Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. James 1:15

Can you help understand how you are separating lust and sexual fantasizing?

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2011 1:51 am
by Reactionary
jlay wrote:Reactionary,

How would you interpret this verse.
Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. James 1:15

Can you help understand how you are separating lust and sexual fantasizing?
I see James 1 talking about temptations in general.

By the way, since "lust" is defined as:

1 very strong sexual desire, especially when love is not involved
2 very strong desire for sth or enjoyment of sth
to satisfy his lust for power
She has a real lust for life (=she really enjoys life)


How do we know it means specifically sexual lust? Furthermore, the equivalent of that word in my language (used in the translation of my Bible) can also mean sexual or any other type of desire. Sex isn't mentioned earlier in James 1, so I don't currently have a reason to assume that it refers specifically to it. At least not from the perspective of our languages. The message, however, stands: uncontrolled lust brings sin, which leads to breakdown. That's why I said that imagination should be kept confined, so that it doesn't spiral out of control and deteriorate the person. I don't see anything good in supressing it, this can only cause problems in my opinion. Such thoughts will come, especially if you're young, now I suppose you could bang your head against a wall to punish yourself, castrate yourself, or figure out a way to deal with it. I don't know a better approach. Please let me know if you do.

How do I separate lust and fantasizing? Lust is, in my opinion, a realistic desire of fulfilling a certain fantasy. That is, you won't hesitate to fulfill it if chance arises. Fantasizing, on the other hand, means that you understand that thoughts in your head are merely thoughts that shouldn't be seriously considered, since this specific kind of thoughts are mostly motivated by chemical/hormonal activity, not by reason. This sort of reduction to mere thoughts has helped me a lot when dealing with irrational desires in general, fears, obsessions etc.

Re: Where do you guys stand?

Posted: Sun Aug 14, 2011 4:11 am
by Jonouchi Katsuya
Do you know how many men/boys I know who masturbate on a daily basis? They are still quite capable of going about their daily lives. Masturbating frequently does not necessarily equate to an addiction. The majority of people who masturbate don't become addicted. It can actually be rather unhealthy for a man not to relieve himself (by either sex or masturbation) when he needs it. When he needs it is kind of something up to him. We all know (or should know) that erections occur naturally and don't necessarily go away when you "just don't think about it." From a Christian stand-point, I think that as long as you're not intentionally trying to arouse yourself (ie; watching porn), it should be fine.

Personally, I don't mind at all if people watch porn or otherwise arouse themselves, but this is a Christian website and I'm trying to remain objective.