Hurtful Comment from an atheist classmate

[YoungApolegist]

Me: What do you think about Christians?
Him:I like Christians...... if they're cooked right.
The following comment has hurt me deeply on an emotional level. Not only has it made me afraid to talk to atheists, but I offends me on a personal level too. I hate the use of the word "cooked" because I had a friend who's grandfather was killed in the holocaust.

[RickD]

Me: What do you think about Christians?
Him:I like Christians...... if they're cooked right.
The following comment has hurt me deeply on an emotional level. Not only has it made me afraid to talk to atheists, but I offends me on a personal level too. I hate the use of the word "cooked" because I had a friend who's grandfather was killed in the holocaust.

I wouldn't make too much of that. You're going to have to have much thicker skin if you're going to speak to atheists. It was obviously a joke. The best reaction would have been to laugh it off.

[FlawedIntellect]

Me: What do you think about Christians?
Him:I like Christians...... if they're cooked right.
The following comment has hurt me deeply on an emotional level. Not only has it made me afraid to talk to atheists, but I offends me on a personal level too. I hate the use of the word "cooked" because I had a friend who's grandfather was killed in the holocaust.

What does he think of salmon, tuna, or trout? :3 (A good-natured quip or joke such as this could diffuse tension.) "Gee, I sure love some cooked goose."
I'm sure people here have heard much worse.

[Granted, as I have Aspurger's Syndrome, my responses to jokes tend to often be very literal. I catch that something's a joke, it's just that I respond seriously. Sometimes that's my attempt at humor. It usually backfires. I need to learn to be more sarcastic. >_< I also have some trouble with being concise.]

[1over137]

Such are some atheists.

[jlay]

Let me give you some advice.

Get over it.

And I'm not being snarky. You seriously do not have to let comments from others upset you.
That is a choice. I don't know the exact tone but it actually sounded funny. I'd just have laughed along.

Honestly, if you're going to be that sensitive it might be better to not ask questions.

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

You sound like a wimp. You really need to get tougher, YoungA. A lot tougher.

Honestly, if you're going to be that sensitive it might be better to not ask questions.

I agree with jlay. Have you ever considered the monastic life?

FL

[Seeker]

YoungApolegist I can relate in someway. I am in highschool and I strike conversation quite often with students of different beliefs (mostly students of dis-belief ) and I come across people who have said things negatively towards me and my beliefs. At first I was like you and got depressed and sad but truthfully FL is right. You can be a "wimp" when it comes to situations like that. most of the times their comments are pointless and usually hold no purpose when thought about. Just laugh it off it will make the other person feel as if him saying that does not bother you and in the long run could end up bothering him.

Seeker.

[neo-x]

I was quite bitter towards atheists myself when I first came here, I was rude at times. Because I was tired and frustrated by the amount of hate and bitterness their words carried usually. But after some time I begin to see that they were just in the dark. And I was dragging myself into darkness because of that frustration bitterness and anger.

So I let go. A very good friend of mine once told me that one should know when to leave an argument, just to have peace of mind. I have tried to follow it at times. Don't be bitter, or sad. Let them have their say and leave, you don't have to answer, there is no eye for an eye.

You need to protect your faith, and don't defend God, I am sure God can take care of himself without us interfering. Get to know people, people are after all more than what they just blurt out of their mouths.

[YoungApolegist]

I don't know why you are being so rude FL. However, I have gone through bullying my entire life. It is hard to tell the difference between spite and a joke when it seems like the whole world is trying to get you. Do you really expect that calling me a wimp would solve anything? Why don't you take my place and see how it feels? You can talk high and mighty all you want, but when you're ostricized your whole life you can talk. FL, it is people like you why I'm afraid to talk to people. It's people like you who treat my problems like trivial issues and show no respect or compassion at all. It is people like you why I'm socially awkward and afraid to even talk to therapists. I can't even get on a Christian forum and receive respect? Didn't Jesus tell us to love our neighbor? I'm done here. Why don't you lose your best friend to a research chemical overdose. Watch him suffer on his hospital bed. Watch the only non-relative that respects you and treats you like a real human being die before your very eyes. Have the only people that cared about you in your life slowly fade away until they become just a wisp in your mind. Why don't you get driven out of your dying grandmother's house because a psychopathic grandfather threatens to shoot you and your family. I couldn't even say my final goodbyes to her. She couldn't even die seeing the face of her own grandson before the ALS finally put an end to her. Almost everybody that loved and cherished my existence has died, and the ones that remain are my parents, my aunts and uncles, my one remaining grandmother, and my cousins. THAT'S IT. Before you criticize somebody, walk a mile in their shoes. You wouldn't understand me even if you walked a HUNDRED miles in my shoes. 1over137, PaulSacremento, RickD, neo-x, DRDS, I'm sorry, but I'm leaving the board. You are all really nice people, but I don't know if I can take this anymore. I hope your happy FL, now I can go on with my awful, terrible, half-a$$ed, "wimpy" life. I bet you're just sitting here laughing at my post and thinking about how much of a "wimp" I am. I bet you think this post proves your point. I'd rather be a "wimp" than have to deal with this disrespect.

[1over137]

FL, I think you now have great opportunity to say something really wise and loving to YoungApologist.

YA, i will pm you my private email. Feel free to say hi sometimes.

[RickD]

YoungApolegist,

FL said the same thing the rest of us said. He just said it more bluntly. That's just the way FL talks. He doesn't mix words. He doesn't beat around the bush.

You can't let things like what that atheist said bother you. If you want to be an apologist, you're going to get attacked much worse than that. The attacks are part of the job. If you can't handle something very mild like you encountered, then you're in for a big surprise. You'll hear much worse.

As much as we don't like to hear the truth sometimes, we need to listen to what others are saying. Listen to what FL and others are saying here.

I hope you decide to stick around here. You can learn a lot from the people here. If you want to learn about apologetics, this is a great site.

[Furstentum Liechtenstein]

I don't know why you are being so rude FL...

You are going to have to learn to be a lot - a lot - tougher, YA. As for the various trials in your life, we all go through trials. I'm tempted to say, ''Get over it!'' but I sense you ennumerate these trials as some sort of badge of honor. Don't become a sad Christian who keeps telling people about how your dog was run over, how your best friend died in your arms, how everything in your life is just damn-rotten. Nobody wants to be around a person like that.

I know a guy like you. His name is Claude, he's 45 and has worked all his life in a grocery store, in the produce section, placing fruits & vegetables here & there. He has no wife, is estranged from his family and - apart from me - has no friends. Claude tells everyone he meets how people are mean to him and how they take advantage of his gentleness and willingness to help. That's the story he keeps telling himself...but you know what? Claude is his own biggest problem.

So, YA, do you want to become like Claude?

FL

[YoungApolegist]

I don't know why you are being so rude FL...

You are going to have to learn to be a lot - a lot - tougher, YA. As for the various trials in your life, we all go through trials. I'm tempted to say, ''Get over it!'' but I sense you ennumerate these trials as some sort of badge of honor. Don't become a sad Christian who keeps telling people about how your dog was run over, how your best friend died in your arms, how everything in your life is just damn-rotten. Nobody wants to be around a person like that.

I know a guy like you. His name is Claude, he's 45 and has worked all his life in a grocery store, in the produce section, placing fruits & vegetables here & there. He has no wife, is estranged from his family and - apart from me - has no friends. Claude tells everyone he meets how people are mean to him and how they take advantage of his gentleness and willingness to help. That's the story he keeps telling himself...but you know what? Claude is his own biggest problem.

So, YA, do you want to become like Claude?

FL

Guess what everyone, I have calmed down and I have decided to stayI. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm trying to use my problems as a badge of honor. Instead of respecting my friend, I have tarnished his memory by using him as an argumentative tool. No I don't want to be like Claude, FL. I guess it just affects me because I am going through tough times. I kind of feel embarrassed about my post last night. I wasn't really sensible. I guess it's too late now. I don't know what you think about me FL, but I hope that post didn't ruin your view of me. I don't what you to think of me as a whiny b*tch because of what I posted. I'm so embarrassed.

[B. W.]

Me: What do you think about Christians?
Him:I like Christians...... if they're cooked right.
The following comment has hurt me deeply on an emotional level. Not only has it made me afraid to talk to atheists, but I offends me on a personal level too. I hate the use of the word "cooked" because I had a friend who's grandfather was killed in the holocaust.

Well, they say things like that and worst. I guess it also depends on how long you known this person too which would hep to determine if he or she was jesting or not.

If not, then I would remind him of your relatives and that this offends you and see if things change. Working in the Community Corrections field, you learn to tell one they offended rather bluntly with reference as to why and come back and ask them if they enjoy being spoken too like that. You have an excellent point regarding how your relatives suffered in the Holocaust and you have passion on this matter. Therefore I would remind him, if this is the road he so wishes for all Christians or for himself from Christians and then proceed to demonstrate that he does not live up to his concept of the Golden Rule - does he?

However, if this person continues being verbally cruel, then I would respond with a retort -' yeah, that's because atheist have no substance on their bones...' and walk away.

All the while pray for this person what John 16:7-11 mentions for his salvation. It worked for me, FL, and other former atheist and it will for this person too.

You will do well
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