Evidence for God from Science

Hi all,

I need you to keep me in your prayers. I feel like I'm losing my mojo with the women. Usually when I post a joke here, or make a joke in "real life", the women really enjoy my sense of humor. I don't know what to do. I posted, using my usual biting sarcasm, and Melanie didn't find my joke funny. See?
http://discussions.godandscience.org/vi ... ng#p155762

I'm short, ugly, poor, and now my jokes don't make women laugh. What can I do? If my sense of humor is failing me, I have nothing left in life! I am a poor, poor soul!

Please pray for my mojo to return.

Contact melanie directly and tell her you appreciate her. She's Australian, so she speaks with a funny accent, and she drives on the wrong side of the road. Ask Danieltwotwenty to teach you some Aussie Strine (something beyond ''G'day! You wash up good, mate!'') and write clearly that you enjoy her presence here... and tell her you like her to-the-point, succinct, no-nonsense posts.

I'm convinced that you are living through a cultural misunderstanding. Go for it, I'll pray for you (maybe, if I remember.)

FL

Ok, let me see. Am woman. Try some joke.

1over137 wrote:Ok, let me see. Am woman. Try some joke.

Ok, I'll try...

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

Ok, I'll try...

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

You need to try HARDER! Most women will see that as an inappropriate, sexist joke. Or maybe you just need new material.

Much of Rick's sexist humor tends to be rather cringe-worthy. Should we pray instead that he stops making jokes? Or should we pray that he develops an actual sense of humor?

Because his jokes are just terrible!

Philip wrote:

Ok, I'll try...

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

You need to try HARDER! Most women will see that as an inappropriate, sexist joke. Or maybe you just need new material.

Sorry Philip. How about this one...

Q: A man driving a car hits a woman. Whose fault is it?


A: The man's fault. Why was he driving in the kitchen?

FlawedIntellect wrote:Much of Rick's sexist humor tends to be rather cringe-worthy. Should we pray instead that he stops making jokes? Or should we pray that he develops an actual sense of humor?

Because his jokes are just terrible!

See what I mean? FlawedIntellect is a woman, and she doesn't like my jokes!

Don't like those?

How about this one?

Q:What do you call a man that lost all of his intelligence?

A: A widower.

GGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right when you think he's told his worse joke - he tops himself.

Of course, my wife always accuses me of having an inappropriate sense of humor - to which I'm fond of responding, "Sweetheart, at least I HAVE a sense of humor." Which is always met by a look of sympathy or disgust. I'm guessing Rick's wife must have a much better - or fairly bizarre - sense of humor. Else she wouldn't have said, "I do!" Can one get a divorce by claiming insanity prior to the wedding - I wonder.

Philip wrote:I'm guessing Rick's wife must have a much better - or fairly bizarre - sense of humor. Else she wouldn't have said, "I do!"

Rick's wife is a mail-order bride from Canada. She ain't divorcing anytime soon. Even living with Rick is better than living in Canada.

FL

Wow, tough crowd!

Hana, help me! You're my only hope!

Furstentum Liechtenstein wrote:

Philip wrote:I'm guessing Rick's wife must have a much better - or fairly bizarre - sense of humor. Else she wouldn't have said, "I do!"

Rick's wife is a mail-order bride from Canada. She ain't divorcing anytime soon. Even living with Rick is better than living in Canada.

FL

Gee, thanks.
And living in Canada is slightly better than living in a forced labor camp in Siberia.

I'm even more depressed now! Why don't you just kill my dog!

RickD wrote:Hi all,

I need you to keep me in your prayers. I feel like I'm losing my mojo with the women. Usually when I post a joke here, or make a joke in "real life", the women really enjoy my sense of humor. I don't know what to do. I posted, using my usual biting sarcasm, and Melanie didn't find my joke funny. See?
http://discussions.godandscience.org/vi ... ng#p155762

I'm short, ugly, poor, and now my jokes don't make women laugh. What can I do? If my sense of humor is failing me, I have nothing left in life! I am a poor, poor soul!

Please pray for my mojo to return.

You will be in my prayers Rick
We must not and can not have you losing your mojo with the women and your being far to hard on yourself, ugly, short, poor and mildly, ocassionally, slighty amusing is understated and not nearly appreciated enough
I read back your response and guess what I laughed Think I needed to take the bit too serious pole outta my derriere.
Your other material may need a little work but gotta give you props for trying.

I have a joke for you, not my best material but my other's may be a little inappropriate

How did pinocchio know he was made of wood?
His hand caught fire

melanie wrote:

RickD wrote:Hi all,

I need you to keep me in your prayers. I feel like I'm losing my mojo with the women. Usually when I post a joke here, or make a joke in "real life", the women really enjoy my sense of humor. I don't know what to do. I posted, using my usual biting sarcasm, and Melanie didn't find my joke funny. See?
http://discussions.godandscience.org/vi ... ng#p155762

I'm short, ugly, poor, and now my jokes don't make women laugh. What can I do? If my sense of humor is failing me, I have nothing left in life! I am a poor, poor soul!

Please pray for my mojo to return.

You will be in my prayers Rick
We must not and can not have you losing your mojo with the women and your being far to hard on yourself, ugly, short, poor and mildly, ocassionally, slighty amusing is understated and not nearly appreciated enough
I read back your response and guess what I laughed Think I needed to take the bit too serious pole outta my derriere.
Your other material may need a little work but gotta give you props for trying.

I have a joke for you, not my best material but my other's may be a little inappropriate

How did pinocchio know he was made of wood?
His hand caught fire

Thank you Melanie.

And as for your joke, have you ever heard the saying, "some things are better left unsaid"?