Pocket money

[Nicki]

I know lots of you on here are parents - so what do you do about pocket money? I saw it for quite a while as a way to teach kids about having to work if you want money, so they have to do some jobs to get their pocket money. Then I read an article a while back which suggested children should be expected to just do some jobs around the house so they know they're contributing to the household - but also be given some pocket money without having to earn it. I was confused for a while but I realised it shows two different ways of looking at household jobs (I don't want to call them chores because that's not really an Aussie or New Zealand word!) - I was seeing them as a way to teach the kids about working for their money in the future, while the other way is just using them to teach housework and contributing to the household.

So how do you or did you do it? If you don't pay the kids for doing jobs as such, what are the consequences if they don't do them? See, I often dock pocket money anyway for misbehaviour... My parents basically did it the other way, so we just got given some pocket money but also had to do some jobs, and my father was scary enough to make me do them if I messed around! I think we turned out all right.

[IceMobster]

Well, first of all, I'm not a parent, but, in my family, the money was shared. I never got pocket money, but when I said I need it (for whatever cause and if it was a reasonable amount), I got it. Of course, this did not apply for when I was a kid and saw a shiny thing and said: "WANT!"

But, yeah, if the parent asked to do the job, I've done it (for pay or no pay, I didn't do it because of the money but because of the respect and/or love for the authority, which were in that case, my parents). Much the same: if I asked for money, they gave it.

Simple, filled with mutual understanding(also take into account I didn't ask for much). Pretty good relationship, huh?

To some extent, it could be compared(the pocket money) to when a parrot says something you want and you give it a bit of food. Kinda wrong to have such a relationship with your kid, eh?
On the other hand, it does depict future life concerning doing the work and getting paid for that work but I prefer(ed) the way I described in the first few sentences.

[Nicki]

Well, first of all, I'm not a parent, but, in my family, the money was shared. I never got pocket money, but when I said I need it (for whatever cause and if it was a reasonable amount), I got it. Of course, this did not apply for when I was a kid and saw a shiny thing and said: "WANT!"

But, yeah, if the parent asked to do the job, I've done it (for pay or no pay, I didn't do it because of the money but because of the respect and/or love for the authority, which were in that case, my parents). Much the same: if I asked for money, they gave it.

Simple, filled with mutual understanding(also take into account I didn't ask for much). Pretty good relationship, huh?

To some extent, it could be compared(the pocket money) to when a parrot says something you want and you give it a bit of food. Kinda wrong to have such a relationship with your kid, eh?
On the other hand, it does depict future life concerning doing the work and getting paid for that work but I prefer(ed) the way I described in the first few sentences.

Thanks for that - that sounds like kind of a good situation, but what you described with the parrot is basically the whole idea of discipline. Kids are naturally self-centred and can often come out with unwanted behaviours, so you have to reward the good behaviour and find some way to discourage the bad. When it comes to money, the main things my two want to spend it on are treats like sweet stuff and chewing gum - I'm happy for them to buy some of those but I figure I might as well give them a fixed amount to spend (assuming they haven't lost any through bad behaviour - there have been a few weeks when I haven't had to give them anything, they've been such little horrors!) and they can learn something about managing money as well - they know they only have a limited amount and they have to decide what to do with it.