Jesus: The Ass-Kicker

Darwin_Rocks · Post by **Darwin_Rocks** » Wed Mar 30, 2005 4:16 pm

Hey I was doing some thinking the other night and I came up with a movie idea that nobody has thought of and that everyone wants to see (except on South Park in animated form)

Jesus kicking ass with a Samurai Sword and huge weapons. Of course to fit in snuggly with the Christian audience he would only be doing this to Demons sent to Earth by Satan.

But think about it, one of the lines would be along the lines:

"I tried preaching love, but humanity still lost it's way so no I'm gonna lay some SMACK-DOWN!"

By the way I consider this serious no matter what the MODS say and if this thread gets moved to 'Garbage Bin' I would still like to hear your thoughts via PM.

Would christians be offended by an ass kicking Jesus, or would they see this as an uplifting experience that would give Jesus more street cred?

Felgar · Post by **Felgar** » Wed Mar 30, 2005 4:47 pm

LOL... Man oh man Darwin. That's wrong on so many levels.

Yeah, Christians would definately be offended. For very similar reasons that we discussed about the concept of Jesus being married and having children.

Mastermind · Post by **Mastermind** » Wed Mar 30, 2005 6:00 pm

I'd have absolutely no problem with it. Christians who think Jesus was some sort of hippy pacifist might be offended, but I'm not one of them. Along those lines, there is a movie called "Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter":

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0311361/

Jesus returns to fight an army of lesbian vampires, atheists, and mad doctor and a confused white guy. Helping him are Mary Magnum and El Santos, the Saint of the Wrestling ring. A mix of funny characters and ridiculous fight scenes make this one of the coolest movies on the planet. If your into weird, sacrilegious humor, this movie is for you!

I haven't seen it so I don't know if there is any actual sacrilege in it. But the part about fighting an army of atheists makes me want to see it.

Darwin_Rocks · Post by **Darwin_Rocks** » Wed Mar 30, 2005 6:47 pm

hahaha, looks like my idea is not as original as I thought it was. I would love to watch it, tracking it down is going to be difficult though.

AttentionKMartShoppers · Wed Mar 30, 2005 8:03 pm

Would christians be offended by an ass kicking Jesus, or would they see this as an uplifting experience that would give Jesus more street cred?

No....that is, in more vulgar terms, what Jesus will be basically doing in the End Times....He came into the world to conquer sin, and He'll be back to destroy this world.